The Jolly Mama

TJM Rides (Writes) Again!

2009-12-23T13:43:00.002-05:00

I guess I'm on a roll for here I am again. There's work to do (I'm at the office) but I'm procrastinating because it means sorting out a wee bit of a mess.

I've learned a great deal about myself during this painful year of change. I am idealistic, optimistic, and not too concerned about details. My moon is in Sagittarius. My love archetype is builder. I love sports (who knew?) and I'm happiest when I spend time outdoors, preferably with kids or animals. There's still a lot to learn and, like the thing with details, once I learn something about myself then I can begin to adapt and become better.

This year has also offered the opportunity to do new things, like have a real Christmas tree and use dryer sheets. I live alone 38% of the time; moved into an adorable duplex in the student ghetto almost single-handedly (thanks for moving the big stuff dad!); and made an offer on a house of my own all by myself. Apparently I'm becoming an independent woman.

My friends have taken on a more prominent role in my life, as I knew they would if I was going to make it across this bridge. Facebook helped me connect with others even when I felt otherwise alone. I started texting this past year (late to the party but here finally) and just this week figured out how to twitter from my phone. Follow me at mamamcarrie.

Also, for someone so completely open, I realize some things are very private. Or I am a bit shy. Or I just haven't dated in 15 years. But some things are harder to talk about than others. Even though those things are easy to experience and fill me with happiness. So, anyhoo, maybe I'll keep on as the Jolly Mama, now that I really am kinda the sort of happy-go-lucky person that would create a persona called the Jolly Mama. Life is good!

Kubler-Ross and my life lately

2009-12-23T11:29:00.003-05:00

So, in the past year, I've found it strikingly interesting that I started a blog with an article from the NYTimes about fighting with your mate, highlighting a quote about how a man fights with his wife literally breaking her heart. And here I am today: divorced. It wasn't always what Brett said that destroyed the marriage, or even the *how* (although being screamed into submission is not ideal), it was that I could NEVER win. It was about what I couldn't say. Silence. I suggest seeing the movie Waitress to anyone who is confused about what emotional abuse is, or where it leads. The party line, however, is that we just weren't right for each other. Which is true. But I didn't need to be a fortune teller to know that eventually his massive anger was going to give way. What does any of this have to do with Elisabeth Kubler-Ross? She is the psychologist who identified the seven stages of grief, and that is what I have been experiencing for the past year. I don't know if all of my emotions have necessarily been identical to the ones she classified. I've been so angry that I'm divorced. That I have to share my children, and I go days without them next to me. That I tried and tried and tried to be a cool wife and was always shut out. That what was lovely about me, my desire to be a helpmate, was rejected or looked upon with suspicion. So, this is not the life I wanted... but it is the life I have. I need to learn from these experiences and move along. Ironically, I still want to be married, just to somebody who fights warmly, who is tender, and who can appreciate what is lovely about me. Please note that I am tempted NOT to publish this post only because I'm afraid of what will happen if I do and Brett reads it. I'm hoping that acknowledging what broke the marriage will be cathartic and thus propel me into acceptance. I am idealistic and want the best for both of us. I pursued a collaborative divorce rather than a court battle. In every interaction with him, I am polite and giving (bring the kids back an hour late? sure). Yet I'm still shocked when my sweetness is met with hostility. I cried all day yesterday because he told me that I need to be nicer when I ask for things from him. To contextualize: he has not removed my name from the mortgage at the house where I am barely welcome (in fact one terrible night this summer when I wanted to walk my dog, the interaction ended with him pushing me out of the house and threatening to call the police; and my collaborative attorney suggested I apologize! which of course I did because I'm a good girl who does what she is told). Anyway, I want to buy a home where Griffin and Bela can have their own space and room to play. I crave the security of home ownership, of knowing at least one thing about my uncertain future. But, does any of that matter? He is in a relationship now with somebody I suspect he was in love with for awhile before the divorce but, whatever, maybe that explains the nastiness. I certainly like the idea that he was unhappy because he wanted to be with somebody else better than him being an abusive jerk and me a stupid victim. So, maybe we can both move on, get past the anger, and put the kids first? We'll see. It's hard to get past the anger when he keeps pushing my buttons.

Yuletide Greetings

2008-12-22T10:25:00.005-05:00

The real countdown has begun. Christmas is in a mere three days. Shopping days have been reduced to two.
Today after daycare I will take Griffin and Bela out shopping for gifts for daddy and the caregivers. Brett and I have ruled out the notion of giving each teacher the equivalent of one week's worth of care. Such expected tipping was the topic of conversation on All Things Considered last week.
Split three ways, just for Bela, this would equal $70 each for Siony, Branden, and Leah. While they are certainly worth every penny, and we would love to make their merry days merrier, this is a wee bit excessive for our family.
I read something great in Body + Soul magazine yesterday about the wisdom of giving more than one actually has. Giving 'til it hurts is not very zen. In fact, I think the entire December issue discusses the Buddhist idea of attachment in relation to holiday giving. Attachment to the idea of the perfect gift is restrictive.
And perhaps it is why the shoppers at Target this Saturday and last were acting either crazed or dazed. Good manners seem to have fallen by the snowy wayside lately.
There was a great article about my favorite holiday movie, It's A Wonderful Life on nytimes.com this weekend. The movie airs Wednesday, Dec. 24 on NBC. The meaning of the film for moi is that if your children didn't exist, nothing else would really matter. Or something... This was also the feeling I had at the end of Break Up with Vince Vaughn and Jennifer Aniston.
Griffin turned six last week. Besides a big birthday party with fifteen of his best pals at Jumpin' Jax Bounce House, we celebrated his actual birthday with lunch at school together and a Christmas Concert at the High School. I have lived my entire life to sit in the audience of a holiday program. Truly. I nearly cried with sentiment.
Bela is beginning to potty train. She has tinkled on the potty several times now and picked out Dora and princess panties. Woohoo! I can't wait to live without diapers.
Yesterday we went to visit Santa and I got to practice non-attachment. It was to be my last gasp at a holiday picture that I could send to family members, big and small, near and far. All day long, Bela asked about HIM, but when we finally got to the mall she cried and hid her face. I think the sight of the big man, talking and looking oh-so-real, freaked her out. It happens. This is the same Santa, however, whose lap she sat on at three months wearing an overflowing cloth diaper. We didn't even pay for the picture package that year...
I am blogging from my office which made this funny article strike a little close to home. Read this day-in-the-life of an office slacker. Very funny! Now back to work until lunchtime when I plan to go shopping.

40 Shopping Days Left

2008-11-15T00:02:00.003-05:00

It looks as if Santa will NOT be bringing this lovely little home-away-from-home to our house for baby bling bling's magical day. :( Toys 'R Us has it on sale until next weekend, marked down from $500 to $249. However, I just realized that shipping & handling is also $249. And then there is tax. So, I guess we're back to plan a, which is to redo her room. The discount on Flor tiles continues through next weekend. I'm interested in giving experiences this year, rather than stuff. Brett thinks this is overly idealistic but he is signed on for a season of cutting back. Anyway, it is midnight. I'm going to hit the hay and read Last Child in the Woods. I'll update my facebook profile tomorrow!

Milk

2008-10-21T22:38:00.004-04:00

"Juice, juice, milk" is how Bela says good morning, and throughout the day it is a constant refrain. So tonight I had heard "milk" for the umpteenth time and thought I would play a punk song from my misspent youth called, appropriately enough, "Milk" by Dahlia Seed. If you visit the blog Dead Vinyl you can listen to it. The kids had a TON of FUN dancing around the living room.

Griffin enjoyed the hockey clinic last Friday. Check out the photo that CCHA is using in the promotional email. Yep, that's my G! He looks like a toothless goalie, no? :)

I'm reading two great books right now: What Kindergarten Teachers Know and The Trouble With Boys. The premise of the second book is that school has become an inhospitable place to boys. The problems begin to be chronicled after fourth grade, when reading and writing slips below the level of girls, despite equal scores on IQ tests. The problems start much earlier, however, because of the ways in which boys learn. Another problem that the book addresses (I think, I just picked it up today so I'm not that far along) is the lack of male teachers. One of the advantages, in my opinion, of Eastminster is that both Bela and Griffin have (had) great male teachers. I know that it made a difference to Griffin, who asks almost every day when Brett (same name as his dad, what a coincidence) can come over to take care of him. I think it is really good for my kids, at least, to see men as nurturers. I think they are better off for this exposure.

I also just finished reading the eighth and latest book in the Number One Ladies' Detective Agency series. Mma Ramotswe is my hero!

Anyhoo, I went to a new yoga class tonight. The teacher's name is Vickey and I had hoped that she was my first-ever yoga teacher. She was not, but it was a nice class. Not an ass kicker, which is good. No OM, no pranayama. But she did get me to stretch in some new ways, and she kept encouraging us to stop resisting, which is a good lesson to remember. Anyway, if Obama doesn't win in two weeks, I am going to have to do A LOT of yoga.

Photos to Come

2008-10-16T18:42:00.002-04:00

So, it's been nearly a month since my last Jolly Mama post. I haven't actually been busy, just taking care of business. Last night, for example, I baked cookies for Bela's classroom (she is Star of the Week) and made green "alien" Jell-o for Griffin's last day of aftercare. I'll pick both kids up at 3:30 henceforth every day (until today, Griffin was at Eastminster on Wednesday and Thursday while I waited an appropriate amount of time to go pick them up) and Bela will be home on Fridays. It's rather sad to say goodbye to Griffin's teachers, and I know that enrollment is down, but I'm also quite pleased that my November bill is only $601. I am also now all signed up to volunteer in Griffin's kindergarten classroom. He loves kindergarten, especially art class, where the teacher said that he "lights up." Life is good. A few other quick highlights before my bathing beauties come out and expect a good night story: Griffin may have a little crush on a young actress named Miranda Cosgrove from a "tween" show called iCarly. Check out her adorable MySpace page. She was also the little sister on Drake & Josh and was the smarty pants girl in the movie School of Rock with Jack Black. Griffin is going to a hockey clinic tomorrow night. I'll take lots of pictures! He had to write an essay about why he likes hockey in order to be selected. His said that he likes the cold and he wants to be a winner like the Red Wings. :) Last Friday, Brett, Griffin, and I went on a "date" to see City of Ember, a fantastic movie! Bela's made her way out to the couch now. She has a blankie and a baby doll. She has developed so much personality and her language is taking off. And, although they can turn on me in an instant, I have been impressed recently by how nice they are to each other. Specifically, Griffin circled some books that he wants from Scholastic but he also circled books that he thought Bela would like. Then this morning Bela snuck some cookies off the counter from the batch for her class. Not just one, but one for her and one for her brother. :) I found a great website today called babble.com which was linked from an NYTimes story about "unkindergarten." It's one of those "where have you been all my life" sites. Two things about me: since I'm not going to work tomorrow I might stay up to watch what David Letterman does to John McCain tonight and my three favorite catalogs are Boden USA, VivaTerra, and Chasing Fireflies. Okay, Griffin is asking me 101 questions while he does his homework. Time to go. He's got to finish it before he can play a video game. !Egad! He loves Lego Batman.

Overheard

2008-09-18T14:12:00.007-04:00

I am still sitting at the breakfast table. Griffin and Bela went to my room and are jumping on my bed. I just heard G say to B, "This is fun. We should do this more often!"

Milestones continued

2008-09-18T14:12:00.006-04:00

And, of course, the biggest of all milestone news, Bela turned 2 on Monday. She now wants to sleep in a big girl bed, drink cappuccinos, and her favorite gift appears to have been money. :)

Milestones

2008-09-18T14:12:00.003-04:00

My new job has officially begun and I'm home today on my first unofficial sick day. Just before breakfast this a.m. Bela Simone coughed, then blew chunks everywhere. I don't think she has the stomach virus that has afflicted so many first graders already. She's just got a snotty nose draining into an empty stomach but legally/ ethically I couldn't take her to daycare. I wonder how many other parents actually follow the rule that says a child cannot come back to daycare/school until 24 hours from the last vomiting/diarrhea episode.
Anyhoo, much has happened since my last post. I finished reading the Audacity of Hope, finally! Obama rocks. The last portion of the book talks about the struggle of mothers in this day and age. His understanding is rooted in his wife's experience as a working mom, but he also acknowledges the struggles that stay-at-home moms have (particularly, to paraphrase, that they get no respect). Not, however, that working moms always get the respect they are due, but I'm not ever going to be in the mood for the mommy wars.
I had my first "away" trip to go to a conference in Rochester, NY, last week. Bela, Griffin, and Brett did fine without me. Sure, I was missed. And for my part, I felt like I was wilting (kind of like what happened to Elliott when E.T. was dying) but Angela gave me an Advil and I was all set. Best of all, I did not come home to what one of the Manic Mommies did. Check out the video under "When Mommy Goes Away on Business." Hmmm. It appears that in my hiatus from TJM, Blogger has made some changes. I hope that the above will actually turn into a link.
Quickly, because I hear Bela waking up and I still have to do some work for today, my other milestones: I quit the neighborhood association recently. I began to realize that I was not doing things for myself and since Sarah Palin and Rudy Guiliani don't think community organizing is a worthwhile pursuit, I'm now doing things that are totally self-indulgent. (That's tongue in cheek, I really could not care less what the GOP spews). Take last night, for example, I went to a yoga class that was AMAZING! The teacher, Shiloh, understood breathwork, used the sanskrit terms for the postures, manipulated students into deeper expressions of the postures, AND led us in the sound of Om!! Then I got my hair cut at a fancy pants salon ... and I bought product.
Time to go!

58 Minutes

2008-09-03T14:38:00.012-04:00

That's how long until I pick Griffin up from kindergarten. Yesterday, the official "first" day of school was an open house and we stayed together. Today, however, is the first "day" that he is attending by himself. Half the class went in the a.m. (the half that has all his buddies, oddly enough). Since our last name is toward the end of the alphabet, Griff went this afternoon. One mom cried when the kids lined up at the door. Personally, it was too f-ing hot (95 degrees, according to one source) for me to think about anything other than coming home to take a shower. I am feeling unsettled though. I miss him. I can't wait to get up there to pick him up and find out how his day went. I'm sure he is fine, but I'm anxious nonetheless. Surprising, I suppose, since he has been in some sort of child care since he was ten months old. One might think I would be used to sharing him with the world...and I am, but school seems like such a different world. Anyway, a couple photos from yesterday:

My Favorite Movie

2008-08-26T20:02:00.002-04:00

Griffin calls this his "ham" movie.

We've made bunches of Flip video movies that I'll share now that I've gotten the hang of it.

My Favorite Song

2008-08-26T19:57:00.004-04:00

My oldest friend, Molls, emailed me a song that her daughter and husband recorded. It's hilarious! Both Griffin and Bela got a huge kick out of it. The lyrics go something like "hey, hey, hey!" which are not too bad for someone who is not yet even three years old. Anyway, good luck to Miss Molly and her family as they will very soon welcome home a new little baby. I think it is a boy, but we shall see after 8/29!

Oh Come On Already!!!

2008-08-22T15:02:00.002-04:00

For the past 15 minutes, I have had my cell phone open, ready and waiting for THE announcement. I predict it will not come until after 8:00 this evening, which would be a huge pain in the arse. It would also be very interesting since we will be entertaining tonight. Our friends are Obamaniacs and also very hip to this texting thing. I remember a few years ago when we were getting ready to go out to see a movie and Jodi told the babysitter to text her if she had a concern about the kids. Sheer brilliance! It should be interesting when four cell phones begin going off at the designated hour.

Anyway, I considered sending some of you fake text messages à la Wonkette, but I couldn’t decide who would be funny as the unreal veep choice (I was leaning toward Griffin; he has a lot of leadership qualities, although he would not be ready to serve, in a constitutional sense, for another 30 years). The Wonkette site is quite funny (for example, I like the word “fuckery”) but, on several levels, the “Obamatard” label turns me off. Evidently, the writer hasn’t read Tim Shriver’s excellent Wash Post piece about such hurtful words.

So... 28 minutes and counting. My cell battery is probably going to die if I keep this up. The other part of “Oh Come On Already!!!” is this neverending day. I’m exhausted because I’ve been keeping some late hours this week and I’m ready to do absolutely nothing more (although it might be hard to do less than what I’ve been doing all day).

I'm still hoping that Gore will somehow be the veep choice but Biden is growing on me. Check out this very nice op-ed by David Brooks today.

Promises, promises

2008-08-21T21:48:00.002-04:00

When Griffin, Bela, and I came home tonight (and didn't have a bath), we watched a little bit of the Olympics and had a snack of brownies and milk. Of course, both children wanted more brownies (they are my chocolate-soaked spawn!) and I promised Griff that I would put one in his lunch for tomorrow. My dilemma now is that I either (a) fulfill the promise to my firstborn and deprive myself, (b) bake another batch! or (c) fail miserably in the promisemaking department, yet satisfy my sweet tooth (I think I have more than one actually). --also, can you tell that I've been working on writing test questions for my textbooks at work???-- Oh, what will I do? What will I do?

A Big Glass of Wine

2008-08-21T21:04:00.004-04:00

Brett is working late tonight, and it's quite obvious that I'm the slacker in this relationship. Ordinarily, Griffin and Bela are in bed by 8:00; typically, they've been bathed. Ha! Not tonight. I've just put the kids to bed. I should now be cleaning up from dinner and making lunches for tomorrow. Instead, I am drinking wine, watching CNN, and blogging, but alas I am only me. Which reminds me, I found a couple of mom blogs today that made me laugh: http://www.whitetrashmom.com and http://finslippy.typepad.com/.
Anyway, after dinner, the little Picketts and I went for a walk around the neighborhood.
Depending on which of us you ask, it was
(a) a spy mission,
(b) an errand to return borrowed stuff, or
(c) "yellow??" (yep, that would be Bela's favorite word).
--on a side note, I read an article today that suggested it would be better blog writing to vary up the formats of my posts, which I don't disagree with, but at the same time that's more work... Golly, I am lazy. :) I don't even feel like re-working that sentence to make it make sense.
Anyhoo, despite the fact that I was dressed all in black like the bookish ninja I really am, Griffin thinks I am a terrible spy. Whatever! We did, however, meet the new neighbors, the Fletchers, who are very nice. Griffin and their kindergartener hit it right off. There are at least two other households that are new in Walnut Heights (and one has a neighor that waves! which delights me to no end!!!).

Going Negative

2008-08-20T21:59:00.002-04:00

If there is one politician I like less than Joe Lieberman, it is Ralph Nader. I hate to go so negative on The Jolly Mama, but Nader's assertion that Obama will choose Hillary Clinton as his running mate is spurious. He has no knowledge of the innerworkings of Obama's campaign. His motive is simply to rile up the HRC supporters, so when Obama announces his true choice, the HRC supporters' will feel, once again, as if they have been cheated. Also, as long as I'm being so contrary, I really don't like Dan Abrams, who strikes me as an overgrown frat boy. I think he may have dyed his hair to look more like Anderson Cooper. Raaaaaaarrrrrrrrrr!!!!

Waiting...

2008-08-20T20:54:00.002-04:00

I have a pan of brownies baking in the oven. Yummmmm... Brett is out shopping for a new suit. Griffin got to stay up late tonight as we waited for his new Pokemon pajamas to dry in the laundry. But, more than any of these, I am waiting for my text message from the Obama campaign, telling me who the choice for veep is going to be. I'm slightly obsessed with the idea that the call will come at any time. The other night I asked Brett if he thought the campaign would text me during the night. The next day at work I had forgotten my phone in the car, and ran out to get it, just in case. Tonight I heard a text message come in: the Obama campaign asking for me to donate my time. It's coming soon! Earlier today, MSNBC's Firstread was focused on Senator Joe Biden as the choice, making much of his comment that he had a "successful dump" and it is being covered this evening by Keith Olberman. We are living in a land of kindergarteners. Scatological humor! Hahaha. Anyhoo, I recently signed the petition to remove Joe Lieberman from the Democratic Caucus. I resisted signing the petition at first out of concern that it might be vaguely anti-semitic (afterall, there was no outcry when Obama appeared to be interested in choosing Sen. Chuck Hagel as his veep), however, as one of the recent petitioners states so well, "I simply hate this prick!!!!!" My hope is Al Gore (in part, because this was the last prediction of Tim Russert), but we shall see.

The 100th Post

2008-08-19T06:31:00.003-04:00

This is my 100th blog post and it seems appropriate that I should make a big announcement in it. Luckily, I have some big news! Yesterday, for the first time in my adult post-college life, I cried in front of a boss. I was giving him notice because I've accepted another job. Although I've loved being a writer/editor, the new job will allow me to be at home more. Yippee!

The whole process has been incredibly angst-producing. I hope now that a decision has been made and a course set that I will be able to attend to some of the other things in my life, such as putting together new neighbor packets and the picnic flyer for the 'hood, and having a repairman

come out to fix our garbage disposal. We're going up north this weekend with our extended family for my mother-in-law's birthday, staying in Mackinaw City and visiting the island on Saturday. I'm very excited! It's been a few years since I was on Mackinac Island, and then not under the best of circumstances.

Part of the problem of deciding between the two jobs (besides the fact that I have only been at my job for six months) is that the two are very different with vastly different positives and negatives. One of the advantages of the new job is that it will be much easier to arrange for Bela to attend Griffin's alma mater nursery school next fall. See photo at left of G on graduation day with Renae, the director of Okemos Nursery School. It's a special little place, all because of Renae and her vision, imagination, and hard work. I also hope to be able to go on field trips with Griffin's kindergarten class, something I was not able to do while he was in nursery school, first because I had a napping infant, and then because I was stuck in my office. So, I'm hoping for the best and trying to believe that I've made the right decision. Wish me luck!!!

Clarifying

2008-08-13T13:28:00.001-04:00

As I use it in the next post, a "kicker" is a good thing. Okay, read on...

An Un-Me Post

2008-08-13T13:14:00.004-04:00

Well, all, I just got back from Eastwood Towne Center. I had gone there on my lunch to get a cappuccino (or maybe a mocha since I'm starting to miss their sweet, rich chocolate-y-ness), but instead I went to Ann Taylor Loft and Black House, White Market. Woohoo! ATL is having a big sale. Let me rephrase that. BIG SALE! 30% off the lowest ticketed price on sale items. (Yes, yes, I know these are summer clothes that I would only have another four weeks to wear this season. Don't rain on my parade!) The kicker is that for every $50 you spend, you get a $25 coupon to spend in the store between the end of September and middle of October. I'll have to go back with my calculator. The sale at WH/BM was only so-so, however, their selection was superb. And, the sales girls complimented me on the plaid dress I bought before Y2k. ;) Also, fyi, last week, Pottery Barn had a great sale on their outdoor pillows. Seeing the moms with their babies, toddlers, and back-to-schoolers totally kills me though.
On a somewhat unrelated note, we watched You, Me, and Dupree last night again--Goldie Hawn's daughter (why can't I ever remember her name?) was dressed very nicely in that film. The oddest thing about it was that in real life she has dated Owen Wilson and now Lance Armstrong. If you don't know why that's odd, you'll have to watch the movie. Overall, a very pleasant comedy that ends happily every after.

Technical Issues

2008-08-11T21:07:00.003-04:00

Okay, so I just posted some photos and the text is wonky. I could try to figure it out and fix it, but I would rather not, and really dear reader what are you more interested in??? :)
Also, I will update the lame "About" section soon. I promise! The good news is that the email function is working again (although there is a delay of about 12 hours).

Bedroom Sharing

2008-08-11T20:45:00.006-04:00

Here is one of Griffin with his new "buzz." Although this photo is not technically reflective of the summer's bedroom sharing situation, you can see Bela's Dora house in the background. I moved it to the living room so Uncle Scott could have a slightly less girly space in which to stay while here.

Look at this one of Bela the beautiful!

I like the juxtaposition of her baby cradle and the sword!

Bela's new favorite thing is to rip the books off the shelves.

One night, neither could sleep so Bela climbed up in Griffin's bed. It was actually very dark when we took the photo, the flash was very bright!

Getting Out

2008-08-08T09:33:00.001-04:00

Getting out of the house in the morning to go to work, get the children to daycamp, etc. is a bloody mess--literally, I cut my finger as I made lunches today in a hurry, despite having a reminder to prepare them last night. I also had a note on my calendar to gas up the jeep before this morning, but that didn’t happen either. By the time I dragged myself through the door of my office building, I felt as if I had been wrung through; however, when asked how I’m doing, I always reply “pretty good,” which really has no basis in reality.

It’s crazy eights day! 08-08-08. Enjoy!

Ugh! Junior Mints

2008-08-01T21:21:00.001-04:00

Apparently I had a few too many Junior Mints during the movie. The lurching of my happy dance has made me ill. :(

I Kick Ass!

2008-08-01T21:18:00.001-04:00

It was Jim Tavare! The goonie comedian from Last Comic Standing is Tom the hunchback in Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban. I'm still doing my happy dance!

Blogging from the Couch

2008-08-01T19:21:00.002-04:00

Phew! That was close!! Bela, the little stinker, just reached over and pushed the power button on my laptop. She was quite pleased with herself, too. I told her it was rude, but had to suppress a laugh. She and Griffin are wild and crazy kids.

It's friday and I am in a good mood. Brett picked up oberon on the way home. After burgers on the grill, we went to Video-to-Go, where 14 years ago I was hired to be a clerk, back in the days of laser discs. We checked out Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban, Little Einsteins Trip to Outer Space (or something), and Harold & Kumar Escape from Guantanamo. I was a bit worried that all the stoners had already checked out all the copies of H&K Escape, but Brett tracked down one copy. Woohoo!

HP#3 is the last one in the series that I think is appropriate for Griffin to watch for a while, and actually now I'm not so sure. The dementors are boarding the Hogwarts Express. Like his hero, Griffin is only afraid of the "tomentors." Bela is freaked too. (I know, I know, who lets there 2 y.o. watch Harry Potter?!?!) Anyway, all is well now.

Sometimes when the weather is bad, or when I'm feeling depress-y, I think that maybe J.K. Rowling was onto something with her description of dementors. Obviously, that is what makes her such a special author; she is able to make something that is so personal accessible to a wider audience who feel as if they experience it together. No?

Prisoner of Azkaban may be one of my favorites in the series. Check out this discussion from MSN. The trailer for Half Blood Prince is now available. I wonder if Mike Newell directed this one. Ten years ago I had the opportunity to meet him during a study abroad in London. He, Ken Loach, and John Madden were tops. Just checked, it was Alfonso Cuaron.

I swear that Jim Tavare from Last Comic Standing is the hunchback at the beginning of the movie. Brett thinks that is nuts! We'll see during the credits.

This is perhaps the most mama-lovin' of the movies. I emphasized to all who would listen here tonight that Aunt Marge was blown up like a flatulent balloon b/c she insulted Harry's parents; you don't mess with a boy's mama! Now, he has heard a woman's scream that the audience knows is a memory of his mother being killed by Voldemort when he was just a baby. I always tear up when I talk to Griffin about Lily's sacrifice.

We (ok maybe just me, G, and Grandma Beth) cannot wait until the opening of the Harry Potter theme park at Walt Disney World. There is a serious lack of information on the web about the new park, else I'd link. My mom, who is a convert, knows a lot about the opening, and she has a plan for our trip in a year and a half. Griffin just told me that if we see an owl that is really crazy at Harry Potter land, we'll know it belongs to Ron Weasley. haha.

Something that I dig about the Harry Potter series is the comparison of Harry, who is heroic and resilient with Dudley Dursley, who is spoiled and helpless, and Draco Malfoy, who is a spoiled bully. The NYT's female blog stars wrote this week about two sides of this coin. Judith Warner's post, analyzing the story about sleepaway camps and helicopter parents that I cited earlier this week, shot to number one on the list of most emailed articles today. The other article was from Tara Parker Pope's health blog, which looked at a study that showed children of domestic violence affect the ability of other children to learn in a school setting. Both of which prove, in a way, what my father-in-law has always said: that morals don't exist at the top or the bottom of the economic scale. Harry Potter is a triumphant rejection of that notion. He's a middle class hero.

Professor Trelawney is a loon! I have to admit, though, that I have had some strange extra-sensory moments that are very similar to hers (really, did we have any doubt this was the case? :) I really need to add some photos to The Jolly Mama; it's starting to look a bit wordy and boring. Sorry 'bout that.

One new bit of exciting news, related to our family's other obsession, is that Angelina Jolie is in talks to become Catwoman in the next Batman movie! How perfect is that. Now, her partner needs to star in The Fountainhead. I've always thought he would be perfect for the role; I actually think he may have been in his own development talks about this plan (but I may have dreamt that bit of news).

Oh My!

2008-07-30T11:31:00.009-04:00

At the beginning of Jon and Kate Plus Eight, the mother says "Today I very well could lose my mind." I think that sums up how I feel somedays, although the past two days with the kids have been great. I've been feeling like a radiantly peaceful feeling...with them. When I went to Old Town on my lunch hour yesterday, I had an "incident" with a mother-daughter upper class shopping team. When I told Brett about it later, I used a word I've never used before and I'm not even sure how it is spelled (starts with t, ends in t, there is a w, I'm just not sure what the vowel is, okay is that enough letters to help you figure out the word, and are you in as much shock as I am that I called someone that?!?) Anyway, the incident occurred as I stepped into my favorite store, October Moon, behind the women, and the older woman CLOSED THE DOOR IN MY FACE. Yeah, so what did Little Miss Tart Tongue do? I shoved the door, pushing her. Really. Who am I? The other night, I refused ice cream as my after-dinner treat. I think it is has to do with being 33. My Starbucks choice has changed too (don't you love the headline of the linked article?). Instead of the Mocha that I have preferred for the better part of the last ten years, I am now choosing cappuccinos. I'm even reading online cappuccino machine reviews in another tab. Yummmm.... I can just imagine having a steaming mugga mugga (bigger than a cuppa cuppa).

Happy Birthday Megan the Goddess!!!!! Welcome to 33!

Obviously, I have decided not to do any housecleaning on my "day off." No, I'm nourishing myself with the Internet and cable TV. The rain has cleared up; the sun is trying to shine. I'm eating a burrito with some tequila salsa made with real blue agave. I was leery, but it is excellent.

Oh, here is the funniest thing I have read this week. For the full article, visit Dear Parents: Please Relax, It's Just Summer Camp.

“They’ll give their child two cellphones, so if they get caught with the first one, ‘Just give it up and you’ll have the second one to talk to me,’"

The article goes on to say that the behavior the parents are engaging in is widespread and indicates a "fading parental morality. What they’re doing is entering into delinquent behaviors with their children. And what kind of statement is that to a child?” Which makes me wonder, what negative behaviors am I teaching G and B?

I'm Home Today

2008-07-30T10:32:00.002-04:00

I'm home. Because of a nasty little summer cold, I left work early. After being there for one hour, in fact. I went in to the office only to finish a chapter and turn in my timesheet (although I'm a salaried employee, I submit a weekly timesheet to show the hours I have worked on different projects). Anyway, as I walked out of the building, I had a little feeling of liberation, kinda like I'm getting away with something a la Courtney Thorne-Smith's character in Summer School, who claims she is getting her period in order to get out of class and go surfing. Of course, now that I am home, I have a pang of guilt that my babies are not with me. I feel that perhaps I should not be lounging, but cleaning. And, I can't even listen to the NPR parlor discussion of the veep race because of the blasted web interface on michiganradio.org. Bah! It reminds me of Griffin's new favorite joke, which goes something like this:

Him: Knock knock
Me: Who's There?
Him: Boo
Me: Boo Who?
Him: Don't cry, it's only a joke!

He's getting very good at telling jokes, which I interpret to mean he's growing up.
Before I left work today I told my co-worker a story about Bela going to bed with a Scooby Doo book. She was curled up with it several hours later when we went in to check on her. I love that I have kids who like books that much. Griffin now has his own library card for the ELPL. Last night, needing some mom time, he and I went up there and came within six books of the weekly checkout limit.

Also, it appears that the email notification is not working. I dunno what's up with that but maybe I'll check into it (then again, maybe I won't :)

Blah Blah Blah

2008-07-28T20:12:00.004-04:00

One of my favorite authors is Tom Robbins, who always manages to tie together the strangest items that he has meticulously researched. When I was writing this post in my head at work, I thought I might be able to emulate him. Now, I'll just be happy to remember my clever title.

The summer is moving too fast--the past few weeks have been busy in workland. Lots of semi-late hours. Very annoying. Although there is a certain nerdy happiness that I derive from my job. In fact, today I had an idea for a different blog. Since I so often look things up and then go off on a tangent, I thought it might be interesting to track these random roamings through the dictionary, google, etc. This is not the most interesting example, but today I was searching for on board or onboard in my dictionaries. It wasn't there but onanism was. Look that one up! Anyway, I went with onboard because that's how the NYT does it. I also found an interesting article about Fiji Waters sustainable development director. I found an interesting article this morning: Blogging's Glass Ceiling about the BlogHer Conference, and I learned of a new-to-me blog called Dooce. The NYT called it a snarky mommy website so I had to check it out. I was prepared to not like it because there can only be one funny mommy website in my world and I wanted it to be my little hidden bloggette. Certainly not the abundance mentality I am trying to cultivate. But she's funny, and by golly she has a lot of readers. One post had 42,232 comments. She's also my age with a birthday in July. Could it be that her b-day is the same as mine? How cool would that be? I've never met anyone born on the same day and year.

Blogs are great but with the new cable I am able to watch reality television. Jon and Kate Plus Eight is my new fave and Brett likes Gene Simmons' Family Jewels. Which reminds me, I got a message from the other Brett Pickett in town who added me to his Facebook friends. Even though I have known my version of BP for 14 years, I still breathed a sigh of relief when I saw that he is a 20-year-old kid. In fact, I kidded my version that technically he could be this version's father.

Now that we have gone all retro and gotten the cable, I think I want to get a home phone. There was another study last week about the dangers of cell phones, especially for young children whose brains are still developing. Robert Novak, the nasty bit who exposed Valerie Plame as a spy, has a brain tumor. Wiki-hypochondria was not to be my penultimate post about brain tumors. [ed.: I think I may not have used "penultimate" correctly here, but I am sure that my brain tumor phobia persists!]

When I got home tonight, Bela came over to me and whispered some secrets in my ear. The kind that go "ssssswwwwwsssss." Then she wagged her little finger in my face and said "No, no, no." She is one silly girl! Another interesting thing I read about today in my editing job was the Boppidi Bippidi Boutique at Walt Disney World where little girls can become divas or princesses.

Mr. and Mrs. Smith is on FX. I think Angelina Jolie's character is driving my car!!!!!! Oh no, it's a mercedes wagon. I do wonder how someone so slim can have such large bosoms. Anyway, there was a comment last week on Judith Warner's polemical blog about the truth behind women who have "opted out" that made me want to defend AJ. Some nonsense about how she has inspired a certain maniacal motherhood. Anyway, I thought it was very unfair as she has made it clear in every interview I've ever seen that they have loads of help because they make a ridiculous amount of money. Plus, she has two movies at the theater right now and is a UN Goodwill Ambassador.

33 and the SuperManny

2008-07-28T12:28:00.002-04:00

I am blogging from my office. It is very uncomfortable, despite the fact that I have 11 minutes left on my lunch hour. I'll try to catch you up, dear reader, on the happenin' happenings in my life over the past 14 days.
First, I am officially 33 now, which means that if I live to be 100, a third of my life is over (or, more optimistically, a new third is beginning). Besides getting cable tv as a gift, Brett and the chitlins also gave me the new Vampire Weekend cd and a Flip camera. Woohoo! I will certainly have to post some video soon, particularly the one of Griffin impersonating a piece of bacon frying in a pan!
This past weekend, the fam and I met up with our friends, the Babcocks, in Muskegon to go to the beach. Lake Michigan was cold and choppy but the most wonderfully peaceful thing I have experienced since last summer when we went to the beach for a day.
Supermanny is the name of Griffin and Bela's new, three-day-per-week caregiver. He goes under many aliases including Scott, Uncle "Cotti," and Dr. Pickett. Yes, even for a college town, we have the most educated babysitter in the land. The kids are loving the extra time with him and so are Brett and I.
Okay, I have three minutes of "lunch" left. What else is there to say?
Did I write not too long ago about seeing Griffin and Bela as Thing One and Thing Two from the Cat in the Hat? I did. They were pulling apart the house as I was trying to clean it.
Bela's new habit is to "check diapers"--she walks around each of us, pulling on the back of our pants, and looking down inside. When I informed her recently that I am a big girl and don't have a diaper, she clapped her little hands and said "yay mommy!"
I guess I'm a big girl now!

Monday, Monday

2008-07-14T20:58:00.003-04:00

We had excitement here on the homefront this past weekend. Water and fire. There was a leak under the kitchen sink that Brett fixed on Friday night/Saturday morning. Then a rogue element burned our yard waste bags the next night. On Sunday morning, I found a pile of burning embers where the bags of clippings had been hours before.

Griffin had a nightmare last night, and afterwards I dreamed of sleep being tiny scraps that I could put on and wear.

Brett and I have watched some great movies recently: I Am Legend and Invasion (a modern version of Invasion of the Body Snatchers). I Am Legend will be screened at Valley Park later this month. I would love to go see it under the stars but the 9:30 start time is a little late for a Thursday (is that not pathetic?!?) Invasion starred Nicole Kidman as a mom who would do anything to save her darling son, Oliver.

We'll go see the new Batman movie this weekend. Yay for the marketing of the movie; we're able to find lots of Batman merchandise for Griffin that we ordinarily never would have found. Grandma Beth is going to bring us batman shoes when she comes over this weekend. I'm even hoping to find a little batgirl shirt for Bela when I go out shopping.

The birthday swag has been coming in. I have to decide how to spend $20 at World Market, DSW sent me a $5 coupon for new shoes, and Beaners mailed me a voucher for a free coffee.

I've recently added a profile on Facebook, and tonight went searching for friends. Oddly I found my friend Megan (who sent me a wonderful birthday card!) but under her maiden name and living in Ohio. The strangest discovery was someone with my husband's name, living in our town. I suggested that if he has a double life, this may be the time to let me know.

Tomorrow is the day my birthday present comes! I'm getting cable. The sheer joy of having DVR and the Daily Show is delighting me to no end! We'll even be able to record the new PBS show, Martha Speaks, based on the books about the alphabet soup-eating dog, when it begins airing on Labor Day.

I'm working extra long hours, reading loads, but at home I have been reading the same book since April. For tonight, I'll go read another page or two in the Audacity of Hope and maybe finish it before the election.

I'm a People Person

2008-07-01T22:04:00.003-04:00

So I have this, shall we say, habit that makes Brett cringe. He thinks it is because I am from a small town, however, I believe that it is something else. Anyway, I am fairly convinced that I met one of my neighbors when I was a teenager. "Met" is a strong word for the instance. I was a teenager, she was a college student. We were at the mall. She was wearing a very cool leather jacket. I, as teenagers tend to do, wanted one just like it and asked her where she bought it. She was incredibly kind but did not know. The man she was with was on the move. She had to go. Could it actually be my neighbor? Brett would scoff. But, you would be amazed how often this intuition of mine is dead-on accurate. The only facts of which I am certain are that it was more than 15 years ago and we were in Kalamazoo. How do you ask that question??? If I figure it out, I'll let you know. If you're out there, dear reader, please comment on whether you think this is crazy/silly talk.

By the way, the email function works! Check out this site to sign up to receive notifications by email http://www.shootthebreeze.net/blogalert/index.php. Copy and paste this address into the url line: http://thejollymama.blogspot.com/atom.xml. Thanks to my friends AMy and John for teaching me this nifty trick!

Just a Bit More...

2008-06-30T22:04:00.003-04:00

I'm not a fan of CSI, in the least, but this YouTube video is worth checking out. Ridiculous fun for 7:17, if you can stand it!

Monday Musings

2008-06-30T20:45:00.003-04:00

My last post reminded me of an op-ed I saw recently, entitled "Yes, We Will Have No Bananas." I liked the title and it made me realize that I don't really like to eat nature's perfect fruit. Good thing!

We ventured out to World Market tonight to purchase the white countertop composter I mentioned recently. I have managed to eke by with bags to line the garbage can until now. Next purchase: a deck on the back of our house! Actually, my Amazon wishlist would include a Flip video camera and some more Sharkies, a tasty treat for kids. And checkout these wonderful houseplants from Smith and Hawken and White Flower Farm. Houseplants are great at filtering toxins to improve indoor air circulation. Anyway, so much for my vow of nonmaterialism.

Rebecca of Titus Farms emailed today to say that we will have strawberries in our CSA pickup on Thursday, and possibly baby potatoes. Woohoo! Thanks to the CSA, we are eating a lot more vegetables this year. In fact, I was surprised to read the 11 Best Foods You Aren't Eating, and realize that, in fact, we are eating most of the things on the list.

Bela and I attended the Meridian Farmer's Market on Saturday morning and met some great new vendors. One sells beef from highland cattle. Another sells dry beans (as well as some gorgeous radishes that were delicious). I also splurged on some squash blossoms from the Titus farmers. We'll head back there on Friday night for the fireworks show. I can't wait for the Fourth of July! Independence Day is my favorite holiday, perhaps because it is the epitome of summer and people tend to favor the season in which they were born. Speaking of being born, my friend AMy will be delivering baby Zack this week! Congratulations!!!!

In honor of AMy, I am posting a link to a very funny blog I found today (two years behind the rest of the world): Anonymous Lawyer.

The other wonderful thing about the Fourth of July is that it is a celebration of the birth of our nation. Politics, as usual, is grabbing my attention. I'm reading Barack Obama's book The Audacity of Hope. The section I am reading right now compellingly addresses American's concern du jour: the economy.

I got a good chuckle today out of an article about an important voting bloc--Appalachians. Here's a fun quiz. Just to let you know, my results indicated I was "smart enough for the Senate. " Ha!

We've been watching Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets lately. Griffin and I loved attending the events last summer. When I suggested it would be great to have an annual Harry Potter festival every summer, Griffin had a brilliant idea: to hang a Voldemort pinata, but instead of hitting it with sticks, the kids would use magic wands!

Last night I went to yoga. It was good to be back in class, but today my wrists are hurting. I should have done a better warm-up.

The Obama commercial is on TV, time to go! Hmmm, there must be two versions. Aha, the explanation is revealed.

Slices of Banana

2008-06-24T20:41:00.003-04:00

The drawback with writing is that sometimes you just don't feel very creative. Is it because I didn't do a crossword puzzle today? I dunno, but last night when I was feeling prolific and poetic, Blogger was having fits. Tonight there are no technical problems but I'm as sharp as a banana. The good news is that I remember the multiple strands of ephemera I want to share. :)
First up, I wrote recently about energy vampires, but was hard-pressed to explain why these appliances continue to draw energy when they are not powered up. The answer has been revealed in the wider definition of which appliances are affected: anything with a remote control, clock, or on/off switch (such as a power strip). Of course! Because all of these have to have the potential to provide power immediately, or in the case of an appliance with a clock, it is continuously operating. Anyway, armed with this new info., I have unplugged the microwave and coffeemaker. Bless Brett! He's been a real champ about my new mania.
Dan Yaccarino is one of our favorite illustrators. He wrote Unloveable, and I just learned he is the creator of the Backyardigans, who I think are super cute. He also illustrated this map of the U.S., which now hangs in our playroom.
Viva la vida by Coldplay came out today. I really like the song and the iTune commercial.
Bastille Day is my second favorite holiday of summer. July 14th will be celebrated at our house. Griffin saw his French teacher from nursery school on Friday night when we went out to eat (is this a violation of la langue francais that we saw her at El Azteco???) Tonight Griffin said that Bela is his "mon ami." He is growing into his role as the protective older brother.
Some of my coworkers and I had lunch today at P.F. Chang's, which was very tasty, however, the coke I drank cost $2.25. Isn't that exorbitant?!? If I had known it cost that much, I would have asked for a sparkling water and let any "elitist" comments fall where they may.
I found a very cool countertop composting bin for only $14 at World Market this weekend. Compare to at least $24.95 from Amazon or much, much more at Williams Sonoma. I may have to go buy it since I'll soon run out of plastic grocery sacks again.
There's a commercial on tv for Mamma Mia! which comes out in theaters on July 18. Any of my special readers want to view this film with me? I fear it is a bit too chicky for my flick-loving husband. I did, however, find an interesting blog today (Greek Tragedy by Stephanie Klein) which mentioned one of all-time-favorite films, Baby Boom. I often think about how strongly Diane Keaton's JC Wiatt has influenced my idea of what a mother should be. And on that enigmatic note, good night!

Two in a Row

2008-06-24T20:05:00.003-04:00

...You call it dap and we call it knock...

When Griffin was very little, we began giving each other knuckles. It seemed slightly cooler, and more urban, than a simple high five (although I'm a big fan of slapping some skin).

Anyway, I am quite pleased to see the coolest candidate for president and his ultra cool spouse using this gesture. Since this memorable moment in the campaign, I've been dapping away. Time to say goodbye at daycare, dap! Somebody says something witty, dap! Of course, I've only recently accepted the term "dap," until now the move has been known around our environs as "knuckles" or simply "knock." So, I was gratified the other night when Bela said "knock, knock" and put out her little fist to bump mine. Alright!

Toads and More

2008-06-23T19:54:00.002-04:00

We have a new pet at our house--a Fowler's toad named, appropriately enough, Toadie. Griffin has been keeping him for the past week, eagerly showing him to visitors, and tonight Bela overcame her squeamishness enough to hold him. Our exuberant love of Toadie is not in his best interests. Soon we will need to release him back into the wild. Griffin, however, is not ready to say goodbye.

The CSA had perfect red ripe strawberries last week. Yippee!!!

My yoga mat has not been unfurled in many months, but lately I've been doing a sun salutation when I get to work. At least on the days that I get to work before everybody else. Summer hours rock! It's a fairly quick maneuver but it improves my concentration. Here's a fascinating article that I barely read today about distraction in the workplace. I have noticed that I easily get caught in the world wide web when I'm editing a tricky passage. This is my theme song.

In closing, Bela has slept in a toddler bed for the past week, which means when she is ready to get up in the morning, she comes and finds me. Vive le difference! She awoke before Griffin this a.m. At the grocery store last night, we saw Mrs. Foster, the secretary at Griffin's elementary school. When I told her his first name, she knew who he was!!! Approximately 10 weeks until kindergarten! One last song.

Shock

2008-06-13T21:54:00.002-04:00

Tim Russert is dead. I can't believe it. He died today while doing voiceovers for Sunday's show.

Meet the Press is forever intertwined with my memory of Griffin's birth. He was born on a Sunday morning at 8:44 a.m.--16 minutes before the show was to start. And, as un-maternal as this will sound, I was a bit surprised when nobody turned on the tv at 9 o'clock.

A special has started on NBC. The news is disorienting and it is very, very sad. Blessings to his family and his many friends.

Weekly Peek-ly

2008-06-12T18:56:00.004-04:00

Bela was doing downward facing dog and listening to an Ella Fitzgerald CD earlier tonight. Then, after bathtime, she danced naked around the living room while The Pretenders played.

I just broke the news to Brett that she will undoubtedly want to be a princess for Halloween this year.

Yesterday Griffin made mudpies and today, a water slide at the school he and Bela share. And how is this for lucky? Griffin recently got his very own library card and we checked out six books. (I'm Dirty; Dimity Dumpty; a Thai counting book that was absolutely beautiful but I can't remember the name; a very old Easter bunny book; The Secret Life of Walter Kitty--hilarious!; and one more...) Anyway, the books were due Monday. I put the library tote bag in the car over the weekend, intending to return them then. Alas, it didn't happen. Then, I planned to return them Monday morning before heading to work. Again, didn't happen. The next day, when the books would have been officially overdue, the library was closed because there was no power! They will be re-opening tomorrow. Terrible for the library but what a stroke of luck for Griffin's perfect record. Just like Jacob Two-Two and the library ninja!

I am in a very cheerful mood today. Brett and I watched My Name is Earl, featuring one of my old favorites "Girlfriend in a Coma." Although it is a great lyrical masterpiece, I think my happy feeling is because I got to see some of my friends this week.

On Saturday, Bela, Griff, and I went out to dinner with my friend Amy and her family. The time passed so quickly. Great company! Amy's husband, John, suggested the following technical point for email notifications. Check out this site to sign up to receive notifications by email http://www.shootthebreeze.net/blogalert/index.php. Copy and paste this address into the url line: http://thejollymama.blogspot.com/atom.xml. I'm testing it.

I saw my friend Sara K. and her two adorable curly heads twice this week. I had expected to see her today when we picked up our half of the CSA that we share, but I also unexpectedly saw her on Monday when I went to the grocery store on my lunch hour. It was fun! I got to give little Jonny-Banany a banana!

The CSA was a wonderful bonanza of fresh stuff! I couldn't get over how much stuff we got, although to be perfectly honest, it was a lot of greens. Arugula, lettuce, spinach, chives, and something called tuoi choi, which I am guessing is like bok choy. I was singing "Baby Arugula, swims along in the big green farm," to the tune of Baby Beluga after we came home. Griff's friend Kali was here and I'm not sure they loved it as much as Foo Fighters. I do love that the video appears to have been shot at the Lincoln Park Zoo though.

We also had a neighborhood meeting this week to discuss a potential "pocket park." There are two locations that have been proposed. I don't have a particular preference as both sites need to be preserved as green space and developed as park land. I have, however, had visions of the cul-de-sac area turned into a parklike destination...and you can't mess with my second sight.

My other vision recently has been of my three college friends (Meg, Mary, and Sara F.) here at my house to watch the Michigan-Michigan State game; and the wall between our kitchen and dining room has come down. I always imagine Ronald Reagan saying "Mr. Gorbachev, tear down this wall!" when I think of the future remodel, but I digress. Anyway, after the neighborhood meeting, the "new" neighbor across the street invited some of us inside. Their remodeled kitchen has been on my mind ever since. It is beautiful!

Pics of the Picketts!

2008-06-12T10:32:00.000-04:00

Check out my fabulously talented neighbor's website at http://lindsaywilkinsonphotography.blogspot.com/ for new portraits of my bebes. :) More to come, I am sure.

One "More"

2008-06-04T21:40:00.003-04:00

A "quickie" post because I have to go move the laundry, wipe the counters, bake the cookies, get my clothes ready for tomorrow, take my vitamins, and hit the hay. But, Bela is talking...and she likes guacamole! Those two things aren't really related, I just wanted to write about her for a moment since I tend to not do that. Anyway, I'm very curious to hear what Bela's voice will sound like. The way she pronounces the word "more," which I hear A LOT, is interesting. Kind of like "Mo." :) And she does like guacamole.

Start Your Engines!

2008-06-04T21:26:00.010-04:00

And, they're off!!!!!

Wiki-hypochondria

2008-06-04T20:35:00.002-04:00

I won't have time tomorrow tonight to make my weekly post here because we will be attending Griffin's nursery school graduation. Griff told Brett tonight at bedtime, "It won't be as long as Uncle Scott's but it will be just as good." He was referring to Scott's Ph.D. ceremony at Northern Illinois University three weeks ago. Anyway, I'm very excited to see what Griffin's teachers have planned. The kids have been practicing all week. Griffin's graduation partner is Billy Koertgoede and Kali's partner is Maddy Brown. These names have been talked about all year. Ah, what a good year it has been. I'm sad to see it end, although in a certain sense it ended for me three months ago when I went back to work. I'll write more about it after tomorrow when I can post the link to the school.
A fantastic new idea occurred to me today: a daily email subscription service with reminders on how to not accidentally kill yourself. For example, did you know that when potassium benzoate and citric acid combine they become carcinogens? They do and these are two of the main ingredients in Mountain Dew. Red wine, however, contributes to a long life (er, actually the article says that it slows aging, which I may have remembered if I weren't drinking.). Anyway, I have found that wikipedia is awesome. I love it almost as much as google. Wiki is where I found the info today about potassium benzoate and citric acid, as well as the Japanese concept of karoshi, which refers to working oneself to death. Not a good idea.
I've also been reading again about the radiation risks associated with cell phone use and other electromagnetic fields (WiFi is an example). There was an outcry in 1999 and since then I have heard zilch until last week. Perhaps it is related to Senator Ted Kennedy's glioma diagnosis. Oddly, his experience has made me less frightened of having a brain tumor. My new concern is type 2 diabetes after reading an article from Men's Health. It made a fairly serious impression on me, ergo my new concern about ingredient lists. But, just as I learned to like Mountain Dew and Oreos, I can unlearn liking them.
Okay, there was something I wanted to write about the power of Om, but I can't think of it. Some good news today: we received our monthly electric bill and, even with the additional charge from the green energy program, we cut our bill by a third! Yes, it is more than $25 less than last month's bill, which itself was down significantly from last year. Woohoo! A big part of my strategy has been to power off the "vampires" before going to work and bed: the televisions and laptop are all plugged into sources that I can flip a switch to power down. Cell phone chargers are plugged in only while recharging the battery. I'm also drying some of my laundry on a rack. Next, other small appliances and better monitoring of lights. And, I'll have to give some serious attention to my water bill, which is up by $30 in four years. Maybe a leak? Yes, I've become obsessed with "green."
My other "obsession" has been the Democratic primary, which came to an end last night when my candidate became the presumptive nominee. Tonight, the NYTimes headline announces Clinton to End Bid and Endorse Obama. I won't belabor the point too much since two people I respect bunches were fervent supporters of HRC and are probably feeling sad. Although it cannot be as bad as we all felt on that first Wednesday in November 2004 when John Kerry lost one of the most important elections in my lifetime. I remember that day in vivid detail, and can now almost laugh about the stolen election enough to enjoy this clip from The Onion. My new boss sent the clip to me, how cool is that?

Weekend Trips

2008-05-31T07:53:00.007-04:00

It is "Qbo Day" at our house. Qbo is the name of the educational children's programming that airs on Saturday mornings on NBC. We don't actually watch many of those shows, preferring the uneducational shows on the KidsWB. It starts at 7 a.m. with Will & Dewit, followed by Magi Nation, and then Skunk Fu. I'm hoping to get everyone out before the full hour of the violent classic Tom & Jerry Tales. :)

Today the plan is to ride bikes over to the Farmer's Market. We'll swing past the post office and mail Uncle Scott's graduation gift from my parents--U.Scott is now Dr. Pickett, he received his Ph.D. two weeks ago and will be moving back to Michigan from the big city at the end of the summer. Woohoo! We spent Sunday at the fabulous Lincoln Park Zoo. Check out one of Griffin's pictures of a lizard.

Anyway, I think U.Scott will really love the gift which, as it turns out, was the only bloody thing we forgot to pack when we went to Chicago. :( Our trip last weekend to Grandma & Grandpa Peplinski's was much, much lighter. So light, in fact, I didn't have any clothes for Bela after the first day. Oops! We had a great time up north. Brett got a chance to begin to repay our debt of gratitude to my dad by helping him put the roof on his new garage. We also spent a relaxing hour putting our feet in the sand at Fifth Avenue Beach.

It's been a busy month! The weekend of Mother's Day we went to suburban Detroit to see my very good friend Megan and her family. Her little peanut, Lucas, turned one this month! I miss my buddy Megan. She and I have been friends since our freshman year at MSU (15 years at the end of this summer!!!). I have so many good memories of our time together at school. Probably my favorite is the last night of our freshman year when we rode our bikes out to the east side of campus and laid in the grass of the traffic circle talking about life. Anyway, check out the bibs she turned me on to--BPA free!

Well, the sky is getting darker and darker; Tom & Jerry has been on for 15 minutes; I think my plans are screwed. :( Look for another post soon. There is a bunch of stuff I want to write about!

Where, o where, has my lipstick gone?

2008-05-29T20:30:00.006-04:00

My kalahari clay-colored lipstick is missing. It's been gone since Monday. I keep it in a zippered bag inside my burlap sack/handbag. On Monday I gave the zippered bag to Bela to play with at the grocery store and knew that it was okay because the lipstick was ... where? Someplace else, but I can't remember where. The memory is just beyond my grasp.

I'm trying to relax. The missing lipstick has caused a great deal of consternation. It went missing once before, earlier this spring. It was the same week that Griffin's Ben 10 Omnitrix disappeared. The loss of my own little talisman made me much more sympathetic to his situation. My lipstick was stuck between the seat and the passenger side door of the car. It was a happy day , made better because we had found the Omnitrix a few days before inside the tire swing.

There's a bunch of stuff to do (some of it good: email my friend Amy, make another s'more; some of it boring: clean up the kitchen, pack lunches; some of it just plain icky: pick up the dead squirrel I found in the back yard). By Thursday, I tend to feel ruined, and more than a bit lazy.

The bad thing about the squirrel (like there's only one bad thing), is that I've finally gone through my entire stash of plastic shopping bags that double as garbage can liners. This year, as you may recall, is my year to live "green." It's working. I've bought a bunch of those reusable grocery bags. We joined a CSA with my friend Sara and her family, set to begin week after next. I signed up to get part of our electricity from wind, water, and biomass. Surely, there must be more than that but, as I said already, it is Thursday.

Tangentially, Brett and I are watching Last Comic Standing and I'm amazed how much Bill Bellamy, the host, looks like Bela's teacher. Griffin will be joining her school soon in the Zebra/Gecko room. He, too, will have a male teacher. My favorite comic tonight so far has been the Star Wars guy who chided the audience for having some dishonest girls. Here comes another one--the guy who can't say "prepare." Hahahaha! Oh, and here is Coldplay on itunes. Remember back when I couldn't remember their name, the night they were on Austin City Limits? Yep, I'm tired. What a lame post. :) Television play-by-play.

Well, it's good to be back on The Jolly Mama but I'm ready to go get that s'more.

Long Gone Mama

2008-05-22T20:51:00.002-04:00

I'm baaaaaaccccckkkkkk! Barely. All week I have been suffering from allergies (because surely it cannot be another cold, right???). My new job is wonderful but makes for some seriously long days. Griffin and Bela have adjusted well to their new daytime routines. Life marches on.

What Would Shamu Do?

2008-03-04T16:33:00.001-05:00

Need to get Amy Sutherland's new book. Will write more later. !!

Spidey Sense

2008-03-04T14:31:00.002-05:00

My cousin Pam sent me this link last night: http://www.familywatchdog.us/ with the message "Meet Your Neighbor."

It is a link to the national sex offender registry - and there's a big, bad creepy dude down the street. Not technically my neighborhood but close enough to where we live that I had nightmares all night.

Earlier this year, I went running near there after the kids were down for the night. Being a pathetic runner, I prefer the cover of darkness to mask my embarrassment. But as I turned towards the field (and the apartment complex where this bad dude lives), I became extraordinarily uncomfortable. Call it my spidey sense but I turned around and went back home.

I urge all of you to check out the link, even if you've already looked before.

Sick Kids in Public

2008-03-04T14:18:00.003-05:00

That was the title of a recent post I made to a local Internet chatboard for moms. Here's the rest of the message:

"Coughing in my face. WHY??!?!?!?! For the first time in a few weeks,
everybody in my house was feeling well. So on Monday we went to the new First
Impressions room at Impression 5. And a little boy who was obviously sick
coughed in my face. After his germy little hands had been all over the toys that
every other little kid was playing with. Grrrrrr. Then on Tuesday, Bela and I
went to the library to get some more books and return ours. And another
obviously sick kid is coughing on the toys. Well, lo and behold, Bela spiked a
fever of 101.6 Wednesday night and now has a gnarly cough; today my chest is
hurting. WTF?????!!!!??? Seriously. It cannot be fun for the kids to be there -
and we're talking about optional places, not the grocery store or some other
public location where it might be more understandable that a kid is dragged out
to do necessary errands. Yes, it sucks to be trapped at home with sick kids in
the winter BUT GET OVER IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am mad, mad, mad. Am I alone? What
are these moms thinking???? Do you ever say anything when you see a child who
should obviously be home in bed, recuperating? What about people with
compromised immune systems - do these people think about them when they
cavalierly go about spreading their germiness?????????????"

Raaaaaarrrrrr! This message was, appropriately, posted under "Rants."

My head is still killing me. I think I might have a sinus infection but I refuse to see the doctor until my new insurance begins next month. Oh, and Bela ended up with her first ear infection - in both ears!!!

Anyway, there's a lot more to that post than a mom who's [ed. note: I had to correct this because I wrote it as "whose" the first time. Oi! Good thing I'm about to be a text editor.] mad about some little kid germs. I was pissed that I was going to miss brunch with my brother-in-law from Chicago and my parent-in-laws who had just gotten back from sunny Florida. I felt low for depriving my dear, sweet husband of time with those people who are so important to him. I felt like I hadn't adequately protected my little girl from illness. And I was sick. Also a little self-righteous as I have lately become acutely aware of how fragile some immune systems are.

But, I tell you what: the next time I see someone with an obviously sick kid blowing germs all over my family, I'm gonna let my inner bitch out to play all over their caretaker.

A Shopaholic in our Midst

2008-02-21T14:44:00.002-05:00

I asked Bela today if she wanted to go home or to the mall. She chose "Ma" so away we proceeded!

She had a ball running around Baby Gap, trying on hats and sunglasses, and finding all the dot-dot patterns.

I was especially excited about the sunflower-themed outfits. Alas, this is the best I can find on their site - the store had a much better selection including a teeny denim jacket and bucket hat. We also found some fantastic little red dot-dot shoes that match a little red dot-dot swimsuit. Ooo la la!!

She is my tomboy girl in every other regard still. She loves Spiderman, the drums, and playing soccer as much as my makeup, bling bling, and babies (which, she will correct you, are dolls).

Semi-colon-ology

2008-02-21T14:27:00.003-05:00

Not to be confused with the semi-colon-oscopy (do I have something wrong with my brain that I enjoy scatalogical humour?!? Or was it the way I was raised? Afterall, my bro sent me a forwarded email yesterday entitled "Never trust a fart." But, I digress...)

The story "Celebrating the Semi-Colon in a Most Unlikely Location" was the #1 most popular article on NYTimes yesterday. This is significant because it is a story all about grammar in the gritty streets of Gotham.

It is also significant because yesterday I was offered a full-time position as a textbook editor. Woohoo!!! The job is with the Educational Institute of the American Hotel & Lodging Association and is contingent upon the successful completion of a background check. There are no skeletons in my closet so methinks it is a done deal. For all of my puffery, I really do take a dim view of criminality.

Anyway, EI, as it is called, appears to be a very family-friendly environment. Part of my benefits package includes 10 vacation and 10 PTO (paid time off) days per year. Use it or lose it! Some people even bring their kids to work with them when the babysitter is sick, etc. Plus they like grammar and can probably appreciate things like a semi-colon used correctly. I've found my niche!

If you see my kids in the next 24 hours, however, do NOT mention the job. I am sure they sense something is up. Griffin told me today that Bela can have his old turtle backpack for "when she goes to school." And on our tour of Eastminster Child Development Center today, Bela refused to be anywhere but my arms for the first 30 minutes (which explains why my shoulders are killing me now). Brett and I are going to take the wee minis out to dinner, drive to the new office, and give them the news tomorrow night.

You, dear reader, are the first to know. Sort of, anyway. There is Griffin's nursery school teacher and some neighbors and all of the LansingMoms yahoo group - these were all places where I went to get leads on daycare options. And I can only relate this news where I can type it since G&B can't read yet.

The Spark Before the Flame

2008-02-21T13:18:00.004-05:00

I've re-copied here today's daily insight from Yoga Journal:

The key to transforming your relationship to stress is to stop letting it overwhelm you. More and more people are discovering that mind-body practices such as yoga, qi gong, and meditation can be hugely helpful in shifting the way they react to stress.
So how do you shift your perceptions so you no longer feel like one big rubber band about to snap? That's where yoga and other mind-body approaches come in. Yoga teaches you to tune in to what your body is telling you and to act accordingly.
With practice, this awareness will spread into other areas of your life, including your work. As you learn to separate the urge to act from the reaction, you begin to find that something like a canceled meeting or having a last-minute project handed to you may not rattle you as much as it
once did. You can detect stressors—what Buddhists call the spark before the flame—earlier, then pause long enough to think, "Well, maybe I don't need to respond.

I know from my vast newsletter-writing experiences this is too many words to copy for re-publication (the limit is 50 words); however, since this is for personal and/or entertainment use only, I think I'm legally OK. I know, I know... Who cares? :)

The mental "Pause" is one button I'm still learning to push. It is the basis of Screamfree Parenting and is something I have long sought. In fact, I remember driving to the YMCA last winter to swim with the kids and praying for the ability to pause before acting or speaking, just for a moment, to gather my thoughts and speak/act with intention. It is so easy to become distracted and react rather than respond.

Last night I watched Super Nanny help the family of Wendy Wilson (daughter of Beach Boy Brian Wilson; she is the skinnier sister from Wilson Phillips because surely that's how she is differentiated by people of a certain age.) Wendy and her husband have a 4 y.o., 3 y.o., and newborn twins. Egad!!!!

As I explained to Brett, I like Super Nanny because for the first 20 minutes I think "No way. Ugh-ugh. Oh Helllllll no!" as I watch the kids go buckwild on their parents, quite confident of what I would do differently in place of these idiots. The second third of the show is tougher; that's the part where I realize I am not so very different from the tv. parents, and in fact, might be an even crappier parent. The final 20 minutes are pure catharsis. We all have a good cry and thank JoJo for saving our family with her good-hearted whimsy and no-nonsense British sensibility.

What I liked last night is that I saw Wendy (who I identified with a lot) give her children stern warnings when they misbehaved, up to and including, "The Squeeze."

Ah, the squeeze.

I've felt squeamish about posting on that topic for awhile, wondering what in the hell readers must be thinking of me. I remember reading something Vicki Iovine once wrote about giving her toddlers a squeeze that brought tears to their eyes and swearing off of her completely (and thinking she was absolute pure evil, even if she writes a parenting column in Child magazine and is the parenting contributor for a whole bunch of daytime talk shows).

So, I suppose I can understand where some people might be worried about the welfare of my poor children. But it turns out, what I do is normal, not bad. Even JoJo thinks the level with which I squeeze is fine. Here, squeezing must be defined as holding onto a child's arm, wrist, or nape of neck with the intention to keep them in one place while effectively communicating to them the need to slow their body and mind. I think part of the problem before was that I did not define what it is that I do. What squeezing is not, is pinching. It is not done to induce pain but to bring the out-of-control child into attentiveness. The yank would be the extreme form of this method. I'm a lot less confident about the yank. In fact, I don't know if I am less embarassed now than I was then, but whatever.... Parenting can be HARD but the lessons I am learning are worth any measure of pain. My pain. Not my children's. But I can't stop them from feeling pain. And sometimes I will cause them pain, unintentionally.

Oh for crying out loud! Basta!! Basta!! Basta!!

Slings & Arrows

2008-02-08T13:20:00.000-05:00

There is no dignity in parenting. I knew this yesterday when I pretended Bela's boot was a telephone as we walked through Target (it was so much better to receive funny looks from strangers about the boot than the evil glares that I was getting when she was screaming). I knew it this morning when Griffin hollered for me to come in the bathroom because he still had a "poopy bottom."

Dr. Harvey Karp, the Happiest Baby maker, is profiled in the Well column on NYTimes today. This piece makes it sound like Karp just wrote Caveman Chronicles, er, I mean Happiest Toddler on the Block, but Brett & I were practitioners of it three years ago when G-man was in his terrific twos. I read most of the book and thankfully there is a DVD that we were able to check out from ELPL. Now Karp needs to write Happiest Gradeschooler on the Block and we'll be all set again for a few years.

Time for New Towels

2008-02-07T08:10:00.001-05:00

I had a nightmare last night that I was living with all of my prom dates. It was a very nice place, full of sunshine and teenage boys (because of course while I might be 30-something, Skippy and the rest of the crew are still 16-18.)

The dream can be attributed to my little brother. He was teasing me the other day about my black towels. We've had them for a decade or more. And they smell mildewy. At least, they were stinky when Chris was here at christmas. Probably I had left them in the washing machine a bit too long as I am wont to do. Laundry is my personal battleground.

Anyway, Chris did not want me to give him my black towels when he moves to his new apartment this weekend. He was fairly adamant on the matter, even offering to buy me a new set for christmas or my birthday. All because he doesn't want to smell like D.A., my icky date for the senior prom. Those are not only his initials but a slur we used in high school for people with poor hygeine.

Since the very nice Thomas O'Brien towels I was admiring last week at Target are on sale this week, I think I'll buy some new ones. Just in the interest of future houseguests. :)

The event precipitating this need for towels on my bro's behalf is that he and his wife have separated after almost seven years of marriage. They have one child; my adorable nephew Alexander, known as Ai-a to my kids. I somewhat believed that if I were to push Chris and Nichole into a date night (maybe to see the Matthew McConaughey/Goldie Hawn's daugther movie about a couple on the verge of divorce who reconcile) then they could have their own Hollywood ending. Delusional, I know. Afterall, I am an adult, 'tho a romantic at heart.

Another Perfectly Good Hour

2008-02-06T13:58:00.000-05:00

Oh no. In the immortal words of Click and Clack, the Tappett Brothers, "I have wasted another perfectly good hour." Where did the time go??? I have a bad routine somedays. Come in from dropping G at nursery school, lay sleepy Bela in her crib, check the laptop, read random blogs, check the ELPL site for books that I find, write their call numbers in my notebook, write on The Jolly Mama.... But today I had planned to watch An Inconvenient Truth (because truth be told, I fell asleep the first time I watched it.) Sonofabitch! I was even going to do some ironing. But, alas, here I am, back on the computer and looking out my window at a winter wonderland.

Croc of Shoes

2008-02-06T13:14:00.000-05:00

When I was working full-time I really thought - on some level - that being at-home would mean I would go shopping more often. I had visions of walking the mall with the children, buying items at mid-week sales, and generally being a very smug shopper.

HA!

The reality goes something more like this --
1) Wake up before the crack of dawn.
2) Wait around for civilization to wake up, too.
3) Cajole little children into putting on their jackets to go out, away from toys.
4) Get awesome parking space because everybody else is at work!!!! (life is not all bad)
5) Chase after little children who want to wander all over the store while I make decisions.
6) Grab whatever I came to the store to buy and pay whatever the store wants me to pay.
7) Spend double what I would have paid buying little children new things that are:
a) shiny b) noisy c) expensive.

And, this my friends, is the story of how Griffin and Bela got new crocs today.

We had gone to the outdoor mall to buy shoes for daddy at DSW Shoe Warehouse. From across the parking lot, Griffin saw the sign for Dick's Sporting Goods (which has a soccer ball, basketball, and baseball as part of its logo) and wanted to go there. He was actually somewhat disappointed once we got into the store because it was a store and not a place to play soccer and basketball.

Until we saw the crocs. He has been *obsessed* with crocs since he met a new friend with crocs this summer. In fact, for a few days after playing with Drake, Griffin would refer to his shoes as his "crocs." Obsessed, I should note, is Griffin's new word for today.

Lo and behold, we found Batman crocs (and Dora crocs for Bela). Both kids are thrilled! Visa is choking. I'm neutral. The shoes will be great for not getting athlete's foot in the shower at the pool and/or sore arches from rocks on the bottom of Lake Michigan but I do hate to make Visa unhappy.

It is also worth noting that in this single purchase I have spent more on footwear for Bela than I have on all the other pairs of shoes I have bought her in her 17 months, combined. Yes, I'm rather frugal. Or was until today, however, the licensed character shoes were $5.00 off.

Cute, totally unrelated Bela story. Recently Bela discovered that she can open the door to the screen porch. So now she likes to do this when Rodan is outside. Yesterday, she opened the door, patted her little behind, and managed to get the #*@! dog to come indoors, a victory Brett and I rarely manage to achieve.

Wands, Pentacles, and Flexible Feet

2008-02-05T14:25:00.000-05:00

Griffin's nursery school teacher observed today that Bela's feet can lay flat when turned on their side, just like Griffin's feet do when he is sitting down for story time. Evidently this is not average range of motion for children's feet. My youngsters are yogis in the making! My extraordinary flexibility is their birthright!

Bela awakened early, early today. Consequently she took an early nap this morning. I laid her down at 8:15, by 8:30 the screaming had subsided, and she was asleep until 10:30, leaving a nice chunk of time for Griffin and I to read a Scooby-Doo chapter book and draw together.

She is sleeping again now (it is 2:30) and I am downloading a trial version of Adobe Premiere Elements 4 so I can update some images on the nursery school website.

Usually Bela is exhausted by the time we drop Griffin at nursery school so we do nothing fun together but come home for her nap. It is a seamless routine that really works for me ... most of the time. It was a nice departure from that routine today to pop into a little store near Griffin's school after dropoff. Triple Goddess Bookstore. The name alone should conjure images of incense, paganism, and cat worship. The owner is fantastically nice. She let Bela have two balloons and green Mardi Gras beads. And, she gave me my first Tarot card reading.

Dunn, dunnn, dunnn (does that sound like a drum roll when you read it???)

I pulled the Knight of Pentacles (my background card); the Six of Wands (the present day); and the Five of Pentacles (my future).

Anyway, for the interpretation > Knight of Pentacles means victory in the realm of things we need to live our lives (health, job, etc.); Five of Wands - Crap! I don't remember. Bela was getting really close to the ivory Kwan Yin statuette. Admittedly I was less concerned about her safety than about owing the store Brett's next paycheck for things broken. Six of Pentacles is related to my spiritual center. It is about transcending the mundane to make a connection.

Overall, it was not at all what I feared from watching movies my entire life. As openminded as I believe myself to be, I still had a pang of terror that she would pull a card, her eyes would grow big, she would sigh heavily, holding the card to her chest, and say "My dear, dear girl. It all ends so quickly!"

Attention!

2008-01-25T23:40:00.001-05:00

Visitors: there are 11 new posts since my last blogging episode. Please check out the post from December "The End of Babyhood" for a photo of my little munchkin on his birthday, newly added. Also, "Art" for a pic of Boo smiling! Otherwise, its all rather boring.

To return to this post, use the back button on your Internet browser. Sorry, there seems to be no way to make the link open in a new window.

Okay, I should get to bed before midnight for once this week but I'm actually enjoying Gwyneth Paltrow's husband's band on "Austin City Limits" (sorry, I'm not being coy with the name, I just can't remember what they're called.) PBS may be my all-time favorite station in the world even though I didn't cite any PBS shows in my blog about the boobtube.

I *should* have been reading tonight. A Thousand Splendid Suns must be returned to the library in three days, no renewals because there are hold requests for it. Great book! I also highly recommend The Kite Runner by the same author which was recently made into a movie (and maybe an Oprah book-of-the-month).

And with that, Good Night!

Leftovers

2008-01-25T23:26:00.000-05:00

A picture from the holidays. Unusual because 1) I am in it. 2) My eyes are open!

Harry Potter

2008-01-25T22:59:00.000-05:00

Different people in my life have been assigned character likenesses from the Harry Potter series.

Obviously, I am Lily. Which, one might assume, makes Griff Harry. But lately I've been thinking he is more Sirius Black. Among the many funny things he tells me on a daily basis [Tangent: the other day it was that he wants to be a billionaire when he grows up; today, that he doesn't want to get married, he just wants a butler.], he recently told me that he is part dog. And remember this is the boy who renamed himself Browniefoot, not too far off from Padfoot. I wonder what that indicates about our family, if anything....

My former boss would be Voldemort, which sounds really awful until one remembers that Voldemort was extremely powerful and had a loyal following among his members. And, of course, he took Lily away from her precious boy, which in a sense describes how I felt about working full-time. Big sigh. Lynn, however, is Dumbledore, without a doubt, as he reaffirmed my belief in the Democratic party.

Anyway, here are two links for Harry Potter fan fiction websites that my good friend Amy passed my way.

http://fanfiction.mugglenet.com/
http://www.fanfiction.net/book/Harry_Potter/

Congratulations to Amy, John, and little man Jake! They are expecting another baby in July, a little bit too early for my birthday or Harry/JK Rowling's but so exciting nonetheless!!

More Songs

2008-01-25T22:50:00.000-05:00

Okay, I must have a serious desire to be a disc jockey.

Roseability by Idlewild "Gertrude Stein said that's enough. I know that that's not enough now."

Float On by Modest Mouse. Also, much more at www.modestmouse.com.

Holy blog posts!!!

Milestones

2008-01-25T22:21:00.001-05:00

Bela has ponytails!

Griffin has a permanent tooth, and a mildly-wiggly baby tooth!

Television

2008-01-25T21:34:00.000-05:00

I told Griffin & Bela today that they were about to meet their new babysitter, TV. But really, there are many, many programs that I like (and no, not all are kid-related).

This year I have broken my long-standing rule of not getting involved with a show in its first season. In the past, it has only led to heartbreak when the show was not continued. Notably Alicia Silverstone's "Miss Match" and Tony Shaloub's show about a crazy writer and his uptight editor, Neil Patrick Harris. Poor me, I kept waiting, week after week for the shows to come back on the air. Even going so far after the cancellation of "Miss Match" to write to NBC and denounce their sure-to-flop replacement, "The Apprentice." Well, we all know how that turned out. But I do insist that right was on my side in that case.

THE list (organized by network):
Chuck
Biggest Loser
Bionic Woman
Thirty Rock
The Office
My Name is Earl
WifeSwap (horrifying, I know!)
Super Nanny (even more horrifying! but hoping I never wind up ON it)
Samantha Who?
The Women's Murder Club
Dirty Sexy Money

And I can't wait until next Monday, when "The New Adventures of Old Christine" returns. That date is also the opening of the new yoga and pilates program at my health club so maybe I won't turn into a total couch potato.

In close, I would like to honor the memory of young actor, Heath Ledger, who passed away this week. It was quite shocking and very sad. He has a young daughter and was a gifted actor. He recently portrayed the Joker in a new installment of The Batman, and for that, he garnered my attention and admiration. Despite my feelings (or perhaps because of them, and my complete disgust with the celebrity saturated news), I was aghast that The Today Show led with the story of his surprising death, giving the stock plunge (the worst day for our markets since 9/11) second billing. What is this "Entertainment Tonight" for the breakfast crowd?!?

What I'm Diggin'

2008-01-25T21:23:00.001-05:00

Websites that allow you to collect and organize articles, recipes, etc. My favorites are the New York Times, Martha Stewart Living, Real Simple, and Allrecipes. There are some really innovative ideas sprouting forth from the fertile minds of web developers.

The best part of all? They have been modeled after the public library system. All articles on the above sites are offered free. This has not always been the case. The New York Times introduced Times Select a few years ago, depriving me (and thousands of other cheap bastards, I'm sure) of columns by my favorite opinionists. Recently the powers-that-be changed their minds and reversed course, proving they truly don't have anything in common with the President.

Flylady's "Rubba Scrubba." It is my new must-have tool, especially with two pooches. The thing cleans everything. I have not ordered it yet because the shipping is almost as much as the tool. If I wait too long, though, it will sell out again.

An Aussie lass wrote about the rubba scrubba on her blog, I Want That Dress. I would like to believe that she would view my writing as more sassy than cutesy but who knows? She is a cat person (in other words, inscrutable). I got a great idea from her though: she posts on her blog twice a week, on designated days. Clearly, a Flylady idea and perhaps one that I can adapt to The Jolly Mama.

Green living. There are some great ideas out there and a lot of discussion right now. The top tips I found today have been to 1) buy frozen, condensed juice at the grocery store 2) unplug chargers after cellphones, laptops, gaming systems have been juiced up 3) stop idling - one to bring up with Griffin's nursery school. ?? 363.738 DAV is the call number for Laurie David's Activist's Guide, available now at my library.

Community. Elizabeth Edwards wrote about it powerfully in her book, Saving Graces, and just recently I found an online movement, Playborhood. Their mission is to get kids out in the street, playing with each other. I like it and have been sharing it with others, which I suppose is the whole point, isn't it?

Music

2008-01-25T20:57:00.001-05:00

Yo-Yo Ma. My film professor once chastised me for using the cellist's entire name in a game of "Musicians by Last Name." Oh, the games that young adults play on long bus rides through dusty Latin American countries. But, I digress (as usual). I heard Yo-Yo Ma interviewed recently on Fresh Air and the selections from his new record amazed me. Although I am not sure the name of the new CD, I am happy to report you can listen to selections of Ma's work on his website.

I listen to a lot of Fresh Air, actually, as it is broadcast during the time I drive Griffin to nursery school. Since Bela typically falls asleep on the trip home, I am an NPR driveway listener. One day this past fall, Terri Gross interviewed Dave Grohl, currently of the band Foo Fighters, but for punks of my generation, he will always be known as the drummer from Nirvana. During the interview, Grohl told a story of the first U.S. tour with Nirvana, when Kurt Cobain would poke holes in Grohl's drum kit with his guitar. The kit was pretty wrecked by the time the band got to Chicago, where Grohl heard about a music store that was having a blowout sale. He quickly concocted a scheme to destroy his kit on stage that night after the show was done, enlisting the help of Cobain. But, alas, the next day was Sunday... and the store was closed!

Moral of the story: telling your five-year-0ld such a story will also precipitate a need to advise him NOT to poke holes in his father's drum kit. And, he now has a very interesting repertoire of bands he demands to listen to, also known to him and his friends as "rockin' out music." :)

I'm also really liking a band called The Thrills. I love college rock! This is not the best recording, but it is by far the best I could find on YouTube.

Art

2008-01-25T20:11:00.000-05:00

Bela with a grape jelly mustache reminiscent of Salvador Dali.

Why Dali on my baby doll? Read on...

I've been diggin' art for awhile. When I worked downtown, I frequently visited galleries on my lunch hour to gaze at the work of Barbara Hranilovich, David Korte, and Mary Brodbeck. And, since the local art festival this past summer, Brett & I have been IN LOVE with the work of Kathleen Murphy Willer.

But this week Griffin had a field trip to the local art museum. He kept telling me, "I HATE art!"

Accckkk!! To which I *calmly* replied, "But you love the book about Mr. Monet. He made art." I also introduced him to Salvador Dali, whom I like, but I really thought Griffin would get a kick out of his wacky art and handlebar mustache. I even found an amazing website gallery that deserves a serious look. He seemed not-so-interested so I dropped it.

Turns out he was paying attention! His teacher told me afterwards that he asked the tour guide if they had any art by Salvador Dali (he remembered the whole name!) Lest I ever forget, these children are sponges and I can be ambrosia or acid. My choice.

In other art news: MSU has announced the winner of its design contest for the new multi-million dollar Eli & Edythe Broad Art Museum: Zaha Hadid, an international star of the architecture field who has designed only one other building in the United States. A great article with photos of her inspiring, spectacular designs is available through the weekly newspaper, City Pulse.

Fecal Matters

2008-01-16T21:11:00.001-05:00

Just check out the writing on this site:
http://www.health911.com/remedies/rem_consti.htm

"Death begins in the colon" ... reminds me of something my eminently reliable brother-in-law told me about over the holidays. Apparently he has some friends who farm and their neighbor uses human waste on his organic farm. Oh, oh, oh...

My Catcher in the Rye Moment

2008-01-16T20:11:00.000-05:00

My perception of my little blue angel was rocked today by news from his nursery school teacher that he had dropped the f-bomb on the playground. WTF?!?!

Okay, so my loyal readers know that "F" is a word with whom I am on a first-name basis. Recall my post of December 7, 2007 "Bloody Hell" (side note: my little green apron store escape has come to an end. Remind me to blog about that later.)

But this is my SON and this afternoon's revelation became my Catcher in the Rye moment. After all, Griffin is so sweet that when I tell him at bedtime that I am so glad he is my son, he tells me that he is so glad I am his mama. He thinks the "bad words" are things like stupid, fart, and poop. Something doesn't jive here.

But this is ME so I began the self-analysis and hand-wringing immediately. First, I realized Brett and I have not done a sufficient job of keeping our bad words to ourselves. Mostly Brett, I blamed, as I cursed under my breath at another driver. Or maybe it's because we don't "church." That's it! We'll have to join a congregation - a nice liberal place that is pro-gay and not anti-choice - but a church so the children can learn to sing "Jesus Loves Me" and not drop f-bombs.

When I told Brett about the bombing, he had the same thought but (and this is why I married him!) a different reaction. "No way," is what he emphatically said, "He didn't say it."

At dinner, I danced around the issue with a myriad of questions. What are some bad words that you know? Would you ever say bad words that you've heard mom and dad say? It went on like this for an unbearable amount of time until Brett cut to the chase.

Brett: "Did you say something to a little girl about playing in the snow?"

Griffin: "Yes" (looking slightly uncomfortable)

Brett: "What did you say?"

Griffin: "I told her that it would affect her because the teachers said it could hurt us to eat snow. I didn't want her to get hurt."

So, dear reader, say it with me ... AFFECT. Imagine the possibilities of this word in the mouth of a five-year-old. HA! He didn't swear. There was no dropping of an f-bomb (except, may I point out, by the little girl who knows F but not "affect" ... but I'm not bitter.) Anyway, the teachers were very cool about the whole thing and I am confident that when I tell them the story they will appreciate my son's stellar vocabulary.

S-L-O-W Down

2008-01-10T14:00:00.001-05:00

In junior high my algebra teacher told my mom I was a slow mover. I have always perceived that comment as an insult and believed there might be something fundamentally wrong with me for being s-l-o-w. Mind you, he wasn't saying that I was unintelligent, and I was not particularly concerned about that being the juxt of his position. My concern was that it meant that he had discerned what the rest of the world was to soon find out: that I was not effective. Of course, at 12 I didn't have a grasp on what effectiveness is but I knew what it felt like.

But perhaps it is time for me to change my perspective about his choice of adjectives. Check out the new SLOW movement. I've found my calling! I can be their spokesperson!

Bela, Bela Stinky Pants

2008-01-02T15:50:00.000-05:00

Just a quick message to say that Bela is awake from her nap, and clearly I will need to change a poopy diaper.

DIrtY versus HAPpy: 2008 resolutions

2008-01-02T15:06:00.000-05:00

I just came from my bedroom where I have been breathing deeply and staring at the ceiling for 30 minutes. Why? Because I was trying to help Griffin calm down in order to take a nap. Since he has been on holiday from nursery school we have reinstituted the afternoon nap (which I am sure will cause some friction next week when he is at school trying to function during this time but is, nonetheless, needed).

Poor Griffin was sobbing that he was mad, mad, mad because he wanted to watch Pingu (a Swedish cartoon about a penguin) and he did NOT want to take a nap. I felt for him, really I did, even if there were no actual tears coming from his sweet little tear ducts and the circles under his eyes were the same violet shade as twilight. But, he never actually said he wasn't tired, just that he didn't want to take a nap. He acknowledged that it was not a matter to cry about and I praised him for using his words to express how he was feeling.

As we both became quiet, I gazed around at my surroundings in the context of my 2008 resolutions. There are, of course, a load of resolutions I have made - from the silly (walk around the gym locker room nude) to the overreaching (become a better person). One of the important ones, however, is to "Go Green," as in the environmental movement. I want to reduce my carbon footprint (or whatever...) but I also want to be smarter with my money, the other "green." It also would be nice if MSU (green & white) could beat UM next year on the football field but that one is beyond my control.

The topic in the second hour of The Diane Rehm Show today was about living happily. Her guest was discussing different societies' happiness levels, with Bhutan being as close to Shangri-La as you can get in real life. One of the things the guest mentioned was that people who are materialistic tend to have a much lower level of happiness

It should be noted at this point that any of this information may have been misinterpreted by me, or I could be just plain incorrect, as I was listening to the show, answering endless questions about the Batman, and cursing myself for not getting out to the grocery store earlier in the day as Bela started to doze.

A caller suggested that people who want to be happy should learn to count their blessings, a noble feat indeed, but it made me wonder "how does one do this?" So I will be working out the answer to that question. There seems to be a superficial way of doing this (comparing one's own life situation to another who is not so lucky) but I want more and I know from observing the people I love that it is possible.

For example, my mother-in-law was diagnosed with lung cancer at Thanksgiving. She is halfway through her chemotherapy and is simultaneously undergoing radiation. The amazing thing is how upbeat her attitude is. She is grateful for not being sick or losing her hair yet due to the chemo, and seems to be taking it all in stride. It is the last thing in the world I would want to happen to her, or anyone that I love, but I admire her strength. I am inspired by it. She has a very strong faith (although she is not a regular churchgoer) and a very strong sense of self, I think. So maybe that is wherein the answer lies. Anyway, dear reader, please pray for her, because that helps too.

Regarding the title of this post: DIrtY versus HAPpy. This is my interpretation of a common acronym (Do-It-Yourself) and a new one that I came up with today, laying on my bed, looking at the blue walls and ceiling that are the same color as they were before we moved into this house. HAPpy is the adapted acronym for Hire-A-Professional. I want to hire someone to paint my walls. I don't know how this fits with the "green" resolution, particularly the part about being smarter with my money (I could be environmentally-conscious by purchasing low-VOC paint), except that it is the only thing I want for that room. So, I postulate, perhaps this means that I am becoming less of a materialist?

If you are reading this post, please share your New Year's resolution in the Comments section.

The Tinsel, The Trappings

2007-12-27T19:59:00.000-05:00

Whew! We made it through the whole christmas season. Our tree went back into the box whence it came this afternoon.

It was wonderful to spend time with our families over the long weekend. My brother and his family were here as well as Brett's brother from Chicago (either I have not yet created an "alias" for Brett, or I have decided that the whole privacy issue is moot) plus both sets of parents. It was truly a beautiful experience to have everyone together, eating my mom's good food (yep, she catered) and enjoying each other's company. Sadly, the Up North branch of our family tree was fevered and contagious. We are hoping to see them this weekend!

We have lots of cool new toys at our house. Some of Browniefoot's faves were his Robo-Raptor, which he has named King George the Third (hahaha) and a spy kit that issues a high-pitched alert when someone enters his room. BooBoo likes her Itty Bitty Baby by American Girl and some singing character toys that Santa brought her - Spiderman and Pizza Elmo.

Brett and I have a Wii! It is loads of fun but, most importantly, has helped me to realize some areas of personal growth I have overlooked, namely not being a big baby sore loser when I consistently do not win at tennis. Grrrrrr....

I also used some much-appreciated xmas cash to buy the December issue of Yoga Journal. Check out their website to subscribe to the (FREE!) daily newsletter of yoga and meditation tips.

Countdown to Xmas

2007-12-22T22:28:00.000-05:00

I love this quote from a story about a christmas tree farm in Belvedere, New York:

“They’d tie a piece of baler twine across my lap so I wouldn’t slide off the tractor seat and tell me to steer for that tree across the field,” said John C. Wyckoff, 41, recalling his own time on rock duty as a young boy.

The little green apron store was HOPPIN' today. Reportedly, this is the busiest shopping day of the year and I was on my toes from start to finish. I arrived home to a houseful of extended family - hooray!!

Our holiday cards began appearing in the mailboxes of friends and families today. On average, American families receive and send approximately 28 cards at this time of year. We mailed 31 (which, unfortunately, was not everybody on my list but it was already December 21st). Ten cents from each card was donated to St. Jude Children's Hospital, a very worthy cause; our's features a drawing by seven-year-old Belle of a peace angel. I irreverently added a photo of Griffin sticking out his tongue and Bela squirming away from him. I hope it will give everyone a chuckle.

To the side of this post is an advertisement I helped write for a very cool new photographic studio in Old Town, the capital city's creative hub. The studio has an IKEA stainless steel kitchen that I am hoping to one day install here up in our crib. Luckily, I may be able to get some freelance work going with the studio to pay for this endeavor.

It's A Wonderful Life, my favorite holiday movie, was not on television tonight, sadly. I had hoped that it might be, despite the fact it aired last Friday. I am still hopeful that it might be on again tomorrow night, or even on Monday. We did, however, watch two great movies on DVD this week - Super Bad and Sicko by Michael Moore. Super Bad was over-the-top with the crude sex-humor but also hilariously reminiscent of high school (and, I thought it was ultimately not really advocating teen sex because nobody actually "goes all the way," even the nerdy kid who is destined for Dartmouth.) Sicko, an indictment primarily of the health insurance scam, I mean system, in the United States, was scary. Canada, England, and France have all made much better choices about how to treat their fellow man.

I'm off to eat some cookies before bed... just like Santa Claus!

Video from G's Party

2007-12-21T08:26:00.000-05:00

Video from Griffin's fifth birthday party. Where did my baby go??? He is such a big kid now.

Little Einstein Exersaucer

2007-12-19T23:35:00.000-05:00

I am selling Bela's Little Einstein Exersaucer. On those mornings when I have had to catch a shower after my wee petites have already woken up (as tomorrow will be if I don't go get some shut-eye) I have used the exersaucer to keep Bela in one place. No more. Here is a photo of Bela sitting on my lap(top).

She is able to climb out of the exersaucer and used a chair to climb up onto my desk. Quite the climber, my little monkey also used the container for the dog food and the garbage can to ascend the kitchen counter in order to clink together the martini glasses. My friend, Mary, the Scientist, thought this indicated superior intelligence. I just think AAAGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!!!!

Anyway, the exersaucer is one year old, purchased for $80 from Amazon.com, offered here for $40 or best offer. Excellent condition.

Hasty Update

2007-12-19T15:56:00.000-05:00

I have so so much I want to blog about but only a tiny amount of time. Since the posts have been rather scanty lately, I thought I would take a moment for a hasty update. By the way, I love those two adjectives and I am thrilled that I get to use them.

I am quickly boiling some pasta because I work at the little green apron store tonight, the second night in a row as we count down to Christmas. As we approach the holiday, the customers are becoming testier. I don't know if it is a lack of vitamin D in the shape of sunshine contributing to their bad mood, or just mall traffic, but I do know that I am psychologically much healthier today than I ever have been. Their complaints roll off my back because I have a strong sense of self. To the customer who asked "Are you knowledgeable about the products or are you just a door person?" I would have liked to have said "I am not just anything" but I did not and that's okay.

Griffin turned five (more on that later). John Edwards, my candidate for President, is featured on the cover of Newsweek as the potential surprise winner (oh, I can only dream). I finished reading Screamfree Parenting - the first parenting book I have ever read cover to cover. Britney Spears' mother was slated to write a parenting book ... but now that her 16-year-old sister is pregnant that has been put on hold (I might have read that book just for the "this is what you should not do" aspect). I have begun my freelance career gig. Bela is up from her nap now so I must go. Adieu.

End of Babyhood

2007-12-15T20:23:00.000-05:00

Griffin celebrated his fifth birthday today. It sounds like a cliche but where did the time GO???

His party was crazy and fun. I have loads of pictures and video to upload ... and a very messy house.

Thank goodness for Grandma Beth's skills in the kitchen. She made the awesome cupcakes in a cone and then had the genius idea to put the Scooperman ice cream inside the sili-cups (silicone muffin cups).

Ruff Yoga

2007-12-10T19:50:00.000-05:00

There is a story on PBS right now about pampered pooches. To quote the narrator, some of the practitioners of so-called ruff yoga "see human-like traits in their pooches..." and treat them accordingly.

I have read about yoga for dogs in the past. In theory, it seemed like a great idea. Rodan's sun salutation is awe-inspiring. I have actually watched her as she progresses from downward to upward facing dog. So, believing the integrity of the DOG was forefront, I always thought yoga for dogs would be a great, fun idea.

Nope. From the video I just saw it is human's manipulating the paws of their pups to make it look like they are doing yoga.

Brett joined me for yoga on Friday night. It was his first class and I think he liked it. If nothing else, now he understands my "workout."

I have found two yoga teachers that I really like at the MAC. Shelley and Steve are great - far more fitness-focused than I am accustomed to from my earlier Kripalu training but overall they lead with a gentle touch. And, I don't find myself hating them in the middle of a postural flow. That's a yoga "good thing."

One more book to read

2007-12-07T21:04:00.000-05:00

Co-authored by an MSU professor. Today's must-read.

Bloody Hell

2007-12-07T14:50:00.000-05:00

Has been my refrain at my little green apron shop. Pronounced with a Scottish brogue so it comes out more like "Bloody Ell, Mate."

Last night I thought I was getting a visit from Santa Claus himself. An interesting old character walked in the door, just before close. He had a jolly old belly, a great big fur hat on his white head, and a diamond pinky ring. Linda directed him to me when he asked for a coffee expert, and knowing full well that it is poor customer service to pass him on again to someone truly knowledgable, I faked it. Me!

Anyway, we quickly bypassed the $2,000 Jura machine to look at the more appropriately priced Breville for $300. Visions of working as a barista 13 summers ago danced through my head as I expertly pulled on the frother hose and jabbed at the expresso holder thingy. He settled at last upon a Krups Combi, a fine choice, if I do say so myself, and pulled out a list that I thought for sure would have my name at the top. Turns out he was not Santa Claus but a dad whose firm is well-known with politicos around here (just before his order got royally screwed at the end I almost said are you ___?) Anyway, I thought it was great fun advising him because he used "bloody" as an adjective.

And, get this, the New Joisey town where my customer's daughter lives happens to have the same name as the street upon which I live. Get outta town! That just doesn't happen.

But, I have a dilemma. It is the one that everyone who has ever worked faces at one time or another. Scheduling. The sons of bitches scheduled me to work next Saturday. Now for The Jolly Mama loyalists, you know that I cannot work next Saturday because it is the day of the party that will be bigger than jesus. Yes, Browniefoot turns five next Saturday. And I have pledged to him that I will not labor again on December 15.

To call in sick or to take it like an adult.... That is the question. There is an unethical part of me that says "F it. I told them I was unavailable on that date. They only pay me $8.00 per hour. I'm not budging." (Sidenote: I don't know why everything is alway F this and F that. It's just part of my vernacular.) If I do that, I strategize, I must complete all of my xmas shopping there this weekend because I will lose my almight discount if I am summarily discharged from their employ for failure to report. But really, I am not going to work next weekend.

A Blog is a Blog

2007-12-07T14:18:00.000-05:00

Subtitle: A Blog By Any Other Name

Names, obviously, are very important to me. I love the interplay of words. The way two or more sounds juxtapose to create a new idea.

I may even love words more than I like writing. In fact, I know I do because I have compared the process of writing to bloodletting, in some of my more dramatic moments. Of course, I like the vision this evokes, blood spilling onto a page, transforming the texture of the paper. Not that I like blood. It is yucky, but I hope you, dear reader, get my point anyway. As an evocative image, bloodletting is more palatable than say, words being burped or puked onto a page, a revolting metaphor, to say the least. Bloodletting puts one more in the mind of romantic vampires than frat boys who've had too much beer.

But, I digress. The reason for this post is that Griffin has re-named himself. It happened this summer in the sandbox. A split-second decision on his part has transformed him forever into "Browniefoot." A name that makes me smile and shake my head in pride for its own evocativeness and sheer brilliance.

Bela Simone has become to myself, and, lately, the rest of the family, simply BooBoo. I have loved the little girl character in Monsters Inc. since we watched that movie for the first time with Griffin years ago and always imagined that one day we would have our very own dark-haired, dark-eyed Boo. Bela is more red-head than her cine-predecessor, but whatever!

I am known online as Ooo Lala, a name I irreverently chose one day when I registered for some website and then thought was a hilarious choice as I began receiving mail addressed "Dear Ooo" or "Attention Mrs. Lala."

Terri Gross interviewed the screenwriter from the new film Juno yesterday afternoon, a woman named Diablo Cody. The really interesting thing about her (besides her crazy name and the fact that she may just have created a girl character that will become as iconic as Ferris Bueller) is that she got her break as a writer doing a blog about the sex industry. Most, of course, were more pornographic in nature than Ms. Cody's blog, which was very literary (with a few titillating videos and pictures).

All of this to say, I am considering changing some of the identifable information on the blog for privacy reasons. Not that anyone's reading it. But, I suppose, there is always the possibility. Treehuggermama had a visitor from Poland recently. Yours truly has stumbled, unawares, into the blogs and family websites of people I will never likely meet.

As for the details of this momentous change, pictures and videos will remain but our aliases will have to suffice in the descriptions and stories. Our location will have to go underground. And, this message will, of course, self-destruct.

Dear reader, please leave a comment about these proposed changes. And, for heaven's sake, if you are from Poland, introduce yourself, please!

In Retrospect...

2007-12-07T13:59:00.000-05:00

Okay, so after my post about "squeeze free" parenting, some calls and emails have come in from people who know me, who know my kids, and know my parenting style, and the consensus is that I am being far too hard on myself.

Hmmmm....

I will concede the following: ruthless perfectionism is my operating style; everything is always about me, even when it is not about me; and I would do anything for those I love, especially my ultravulnerable little children.

Okay, so now I will acknowledge that maybe those three "facts" are not grounded in logic; maybe they are values that do not adhere to any sound principles; and perhaps I need to relax.

In the inimitable words of one of my high school buddies:

"Sometimes you just gotta say F it. And then F it."

A statement that was made to me half my life ago but probably no truer words were ever spoken. Of course he didn't say F. That's an adaptation I have made since being a MOM.

Anyway, I am off to eat some peppermint stick ice cream - my second helping today because 'tis the season!

Baboon Metaphysics

2007-12-05T21:22:00.000-05:00

The authors of Baboon Metaphysics were interviewed on Fresh Air this afternoon. I want to read this book -- and I want to rid my life of the huge stack of books that meanders around my home, chastising me for not getting around to reading any of them yet.

The GOOD Book

2007-12-05T13:05:00.000-05:00

Hip, hip hooray!!! My library recently added Screamfree Parenting by Hal Runkel to its collection. Trying to get the book with Griffin and Bela in tow was a challenge worthy of the book.

While I am not much of a screamer, I am a squeezer, as in a squeeze of the wrist, arm, or nape of the neck, in order to get my point across to Griffin (as of yet, Bela has not *needed* such intervention). And, whereas I would NEVER EVER spank my children, I have been known to yank them.

These actions were so troublesome to me that earlier this summer I *confessed* them to my mom, a child protective services supervisor for the state. She said that what I was doing was not considered abuse. She even laughed at me a little bit because a lot of parents do these things all the time.

But it still bothers me... a lot. I did a lot of squeezing yesterday as my two little demons ran through the adult section of the library. Why? Because they were squealing with joy and laughing at each other. I couldn't find my book where it was supposed to be on the shelf. And I became consumed with worry about what the other patrons would think -- of me, as a mom, for letting my kids run amok.

Generally, my mantra is "I care far more how my family feels and far less what other people think." Yesterday in the library, however, was a different story.

In the car on the way home, I asked Griffin how it had made him feel when I was rough. Unsurprisingly, it did not make him feel good about himself. It made him scared. Together, he and I thought of other ways I could *show* him that I love him. He got over it much more quickly than I did, as I sit here today, embarassed and ashamed about an incident that rarely occurs.

As it turns out, when I gathered myself together to check out, the librarian told me that the book was in the front of the library with the other new books. DUH! Thankfully, she seemed to understand that if I'm looking for this book, then I might need a little extra help, and went to get the book for me.

So, now it's off to read the book because I NEVER want to be so out of control that I use my hands, even to just get someone's attention. While squeezing may not be abuse, it is absolutely not how I want to parent.

Gorilla Buttons and the Ha Ha Ha

2007-12-01T22:05:00.000-05:00

Earlier this summer, I grabbed a parenting book from the library that introduced me to the concept of "gorilla buttons." These are the things that our children do that annoy us more than anything else and cause us to react in negative ways. The book listed several examples, all of which were things that make me see red (yikes!). Thus, The Jolly Mama, and a renewed awareness of calm, was born.

Tonight our little family went to the mall. Brett and I had both had a long day already. There were crowds. Stress levels were high. After feeling a little cranky, sighing more than an adult really should, I remembered a super important meditation. I call it the "Ha ha ha" breath - to do it simply say "Ha ha ha" until you are laughing. It works like a charm!

Batman is ... DEAD!!!

2007-11-30T14:37:00.000-05:00

The Dark Knight was killed today. He succumbed to the vicious lips of our newest housemate, (S)Moochy.

After the dogs muddied up the floors, I sent them to the basement playroom to chill while Bela napped. I heard them barking and ramming the door so I took them a bowl of water and it was then that I saw a horrific sight. Stuffing everywhere; Bruce Wayne's alter ego laying limp upon the floor. I gasped for a full minute. "What did you do?" I implored. There was no question in my mind, or that of my canine companions, who had done this deed. (S)Moochy hung his head in shame, almost as if he were awaiting a smack on the nose. I spared him, saying only "I need to blog about this!" as I ascended the stair.

His body will be laid to rest quickly and without fanfare. I shall use one of the trash bags our own young hero likes to fashion into capes.

Woo-hoo!! Mary Jane Heppner-Gamble, a locally renowned creative movement teacher has agreed to come to Griffin's 5th birthday party to teach the youngsters how to move like superheroes. I am so excited because the kid tends to get the shaft as his birthday is only ten days before you-know-who's birthday. Griffin's party will rock!!! Take that, Jesus! (kidding, of course).

Tree

2007-11-27T10:08:00.001-05:00

Here is a photo of G-man in Tree Pose, which he learned from Ms. Sybil, the yoga teacher at his nursery school. Notice the cool Harry Potter tie and the tough guy facial expression. Pure Griffin!

Quote of the Day

2007-11-26T08:11:00.000-05:00

Today's quote is from Life Coach Hal Runkel, the creator of Screamfree Parenting. I hope to someday write a little about why I like this system and how I learned about it, but for now, here it is....

"While your children certainly need your guidance, they don’t need you to need them. This ironically increases the amount of stress that your child faces. Think about it: Placing your own sense of significance on the shoulders of your children is not a loving thing to do at all."

Toddler Bela is tearing apart the house, I'm trying to write a menu and grocery list, and we all need some breakfast. So, for now, adieu.

Mr. Monocles

2007-11-20T08:44:00.001-05:00

About a year ago, Griffin created a character named "Mr. Monocles." Sometimes he is a good guy and sometimes he is not. Lately, perhaps in the last week or so, Griff has started wearing monocles, squeezing tiny, round toys into the bones of his eye socket. I remember doing this when I was a kid, too. For him, a big part of it has to do with Batman's foe, the Penguin. A long time ago, I read that it is normal for young children to pretend to be the bad guy because it makes something very scary less so, and gives them a sense of control.

Turns out, by the way, the thing I needed to finally recover from the cold from hell was ... SLEEP! I got some this weekend, taking naps in the afternoon both days, and sleeping in on Sunday morning. Yay! Unfortunately, Bela was awake a big part of last night. I'm not sure what was up with that. Teeth? Stomach upset? Hunger?

In the neverending saga of my phone troubles, I am out of minutes for the month of November. The new minutes start next Tuesday. I will have to increase my plan. Grrrr...

Green Apron Announcement

2007-11-16T16:04:00.000-05:00

I have taken a seasonal position at Williams-Sonoma, the place for cooks. So far this gig is pretty tight. I went in to "work" on Sunday night and got to enjoy a delicious potluck and some adult company. Last night, I watched videos on ladder safety and giftwrapping. And, I got a sweet green apron and a name tag ... with MY name on it!

An Ode to My Cold

2007-11-16T14:58:00.001-05:00

Marcy Playground wrote a song about having a cold. In general I am not a big fan of their's (their one big, breakout hit was "Sex and Candy" which just grossed me out, for some reason). So for the past ten years I have wondered about the title of this other, cooler song. I've even done a few google searches, yielding nothing, until today, when I am so utterly sick of being sick.

Here is a link to the video for "It's Saturday" on YouTube -- to hear the song without the annoying stuff at the beginning of the video, click in by about 40 seconds. The line "I've got some kind of disease," has practically been my hypochondriac mantra!

I also like MIA's "Paper Planes". The song has a sweet, floaty girl voice that hip hops weird lyrics mixed with fun sound effects.

One more YouTube video, that actually relates to being a mom, from my college roommate Sara, who is also now a mom. To my mom, if you watch any of these videos, watch this ONE!! Funny, funny stuff....

Green Goo

2007-11-15T13:07:00.000-05:00

I have had a cold forever. For so long, in fact, that I'm no longer counting days, but weeks. It is sort of in my head. It is sort of in my chest. Mostly, it is right in between the two hemispheres of my body, right in my throat chakra.

This morning I had had enough of the whining and tattle-telling that characterize Griffin's current relationship with his baby sister. He ripped a toy from her hands, lost control of it, and it landed on my head, which in retrospect is kind of amusing. When I sent him to a timeout, my voice was so deep it scared me, all because of the gooey stuff stuck in my throat.

Griffin likely has the same cold, or a variant, as I do. Poor little kid! He has been very sensitive the past few days. I am quite certain that the cold has been a contributive factor to his crankiness towards his sissy. He has also been very sensitive with his friends at school, and cried twice yesterday when they were chasing him in the yard. He did a great job of telling his teachers what was happening and asking them for help. Their response was equally great - they told the children that their rough games were not making Griffin feel safe. "Safe" is a term that 4- and 5-year olds really GET.

I tell the children to rest, but here I am, not napping with my one and only chance.

Ooh, but there is a story about green pest control on Day to Day right now. Hmmm.. I wonder if Orkin would consider some of these tactics for ridding my home of its ant population? The integrative pest management companies they are profiling on NPR do cool stuff like bug birth control, bug vacuums, and a bug-sniffing dog.

Cloth Diapers for Sale (Not Rent!)

2007-11-15T13:01:00.000-05:00

Cloth Diapers for Sale, Not Rent, As in the classic song, "King of the Road"

I have the following cloth diaper package for sale, please e-mail me if you are interested in purchasing it.

30 prefolds (the cloth part)
8 bummis (including 1 polar/fleece bummi, 4 patterned bummis)
1 bumkin all-in-one
3 pro raps
1 iplay swim diaper
2 laundry bags
All packed inside a Diaper Champ by Baby Trend!

The diapers are recommended for babies 0-6 months. Bela was able to wear them a little bit longer because she is small. They are in fairly good condition. None of the prefolds are terribly stained, and everything has been washed, re-washed, and washed again. :)

I am asking $40 (just the dipes/covers cost me about $200 from Earth Baby last August) so this is a good value. And you'll have the satisfaction of knowing you are helping make the earth a better place for your child. Remember: it may take up to 500 years for ONE disposable diaper to decompose.

All Quiet on the Blogging Front

2007-11-14T14:45:00.000-05:00

So the posts have been rather slow to appear lately. Why, I ask myself. Have I begun to already lose interest in blogging? Am I really that much busier, and if that is the case, what, pray tell, have I been doing?? No, I think the main problem is that I don't know who the audience is for this thing -- if I even want there to be one. Very few people know The Jolly Mama exists.

At the outset I had two, competing thoughts about this issue of audience. First, I wanted to use it to show potential employers that I was comfortable with writing on the Web. One freelance gig said it was "favorable" for candidates to write their own blog. All well and good. Here is The Jolly Mama, the carefully edited day-after-day-in-the-life of a mom and her two kids, told through the framework of the mom's interests -- yoga, kids' television, etc.

I also thought it would be a good way to keep friends and family, both near and far, abreast of our antics and adventures. What a great way to post photos -- something I am notoriously bad at sharing with everyone! The blog has been a good memory keeper for me, as well. A benefit that I hadn't fully considered beforehand.

But, in the end, it has been consistency -- the boogeyman of effective mothering -- that has tripped me up. Just jotting something -- anything -- down everyday. Devoting just 15 minutes to a single task. Not caring if it is not perfect. Arrrggghhh! Well, carry on, I say. Carry on.

Am I a Martyr or a Mother?

2007-11-14T14:31:00.000-05:00

Today has been a walking meditation. Bela woke me up at 5:00 a.m. and, unable to get her successfully back to bed by 6:00 a.m. when Griffin woke up -- also WAY too early -- I gave up. I was not content, however, to simply greet my two little sunshines with a smile and bowls of cereal. I bitched. I threatened. And, inwardly, I felt very, very sorry for poor little ol' me who didn't get enough sleep ... and guilty that I was being so very, very undisciplined. Until I began to incorporate a few of the habits I've learned from meditation. As each negative thought would bubble to the surface, I would label it and then let it go. That "poor little ol' me" bit? Martyrdom. Goodbye, martyr!

Video Stars

2007-11-07T15:08:00.000-05:00

Two little videos coming - one of Bela from a couple weeks ago and one that Griffin made yesterday (note the "special" effect!)

Happy Halloween!

2007-10-31T13:54:00.000-04:00

The photo at left is from Truck-or-Treat, an event that was held earlier this month. Griffin is Venom and Bela is SpiderGirl. The only other kid dressed as Venom happened to be Griffin's best friend, Quinn, from nursery school.

Griffin told me yesterday that he would prefer to be Dracula for Halloween this year. Perhaps this is the downfall of allowing him to wear the costume for a month. Ah well, we've already been out to trick-or-treat twice.

To celebrate our seventh anniversary over the weekend, Brett and I went to see the vampire film 30 Days of Night.

The premise of the film is that vampires descend upon the town of Barrow, Alaska during the town's month-long darkness. The sheriff and a small crew of survivors hole up in different places, trying to outlast the truly creepy looking vampires.

Thankfully the actor who plays Hagrid in the Harry Potter movies was one of the survivors. During the scary parts I was calmed by repeating "Rubeus Hagrid" over and over again.

The importance of family seems to be a theme in vampire films. It was reiterated throughout 30 Days of Night and is again seen in the 2004 Dawn of the Dead remake. Another film I was only able to watch because of the involvement of a well-known actor, Mekhi Pheiffer, whose poor zombie baby ruined his desired chance for redemption.

Round Up

2007-10-25T10:16:00.000-04:00

Some new family traditions have begun this fall and I have been intending to write about them for awhile now. So, with no further adieu, here is my tops list:
1.) the MSU Homecoming Parade was great this year! Highlights included Griffin shouting "Obama, Obama" as the College Democrats passed and the giant bookworm float.
2) the Great Pumpkin Walk, trick-or-treating on Thursday night before Halloween at downtown East Lansing businesses. Afterwards, the four of us went out to dinner at Dublin Square, an Irish themed restaurant in the former Evergreen Grill.
3) a massage from Molly who has been my friend for 20 years. She has created an amazing space at the Universal Healing Center in our hometown. I am so proud of her!
4) CHARM! Griffin laying it on at Grandma Beth's retirement party. He stuck with her through most of the party, enchanting her colleagues and friends. Both kids were at their best after the Great Pumpkin Walk, leading one fellow diner at Dublin Square to comment that they were "the best behaved kids" she had ever encountered, including her own. I'm certainly not bragging as I give all the credit to them... and I realize that next time we are out in public the review may not be so favorable.

Out of the mouths of bebes

2007-10-19T21:59:00.000-04:00

Be scared to be amazed

Glowing up underpants and glowing up pajamas

Mines

Wery, wery cool

These are just a few of my favorite Griffin-isms.

Bela cuddled against my legs today, said I love you, looked up at me and called me mama. Yay!

It's Saturday!

2007-10-13T13:03:00.000-04:00

There have been a ton of things happening lately that I have thought "I've got to add that to my blog!" In fact, as I ruminate on things since I started The Jolly Mama, I find myself giving the thoughts titles. For the life of me, I cannot think of any of them right now. This is the first quiet chance I have had to update my blog and unfortunately, my mind is a blank. Ah well.

Soon to post are a picture of Griffin standing in tree pose under a tree at Impression 5 Science Center. We went to the MSU Homecoming Parade last night (without the camera, zut alors!) -- aha, this is something I want to post more about but, for now, I think I'll take a nap. The kiddos are sleeping and so should I.